These days, a lot of folks do their own custom vows.

There are many reasons for that, but among them may be that the standard old “sickness and health” type stipulations just didn’t cover enough.

For instance, what if your spouse just, like, farts a lot?

This guy has some opinions, because he’s had it with the stench.

AITA for telling my wife to not eat chocolate before bed so I don’t have to smell her farts?

My wife is lactose intolerant.

She is also a big chocolate lover.

We had gotten a bunch of candy during Easter from relatives and that candy of course included chocolate.

She has been eating a BUNCH of chocolate.

Which is nice since she has definitely been a lot happier lately🤣 but one thing is that she’s also been having some serious gas at night.

This isn’t run-of-the-mill fart aversion, either.

I am somewhat of a germaphobe and hate the idea that farts are just fecal matter particles.

I discussed this with her before and she agrees the idea of breathing that in is gross.

But when we go to bed she is just ripping absolute *** and it’s unbearable.

I feel like I’m sleeping next to a lawnmower that keeps failing to start but rather than smelling gas I’m smelling the saddening smells that come out of my poor wife.

And then came the confrontation.

I got fed up with it last night.

I told her “you gotta stop eating chocolate.”

I didn’t yell or say it rudely but instead, rather sternly.

She was confused as I normally don’t speak to her in that tone.

I tried telling her I just don’t like the smell and she thought I was trying to beat around the bush or something like I was calling her fat (which I wasn’t)

Yada yada yada I ended up sleeping on the couch.

It’s always been weird to me that we have a social norm where women can just send men to the couch as some sort of relationship punishment, like a kid being sent to his room.

Don’t know when that started but it might be time to revisit.

She was upset that I care about the smell at all since she’s my wife.

But it’s still gross to me.

We never fought but it seems there’s some tension between us now.

Did I go about this poorly?

So, what says the internet?

Maybe there’s negotiation to be had?

Of course, we need to check the science on this one.

They say turnabout is fair in love and war.

This whole situation really stinks.

It sounds like they’re squaring up for battle.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.