When you live in an apartment building, you have to expect that you will occasionally hear noises from your neighbors.

What would you do if your next door neighbors had an autistic son who was extremely loud, but they could keep him quiet for weeks at a time after you complain?

That is the situation the couple in this story was in, and they feel bad about filing a complaint every few months because they know it can be difficult with a special needs child.

Are they wrong for filing complaints? Let’s read the whole story to decide.

AITA for complaining about my neighbor’s autistic son

I (24F) moved into an apartment with my gf (29F) back in October 2020.

Everything was going great, but the one thing that irritated me was this constant stomping that would shake my entire unit.

The ceiling would rumble, and so I assumed it was the upstairs neighbors.

We tried to resolve the issue amicably, buying a pack of beer and attaching a note about the noise and how we’d appreciate it if they were more mindful of the disturbance.

Usually it is pretty easy to pinpoint where sound is coming from.

However, our neighbors come to us shortly after claiming that the noise wasn’t actually them, and that they’ve been hearing the same noise BELOW them since the previous year.

So, after several weeks of trying to figure it out, I finally shot a text to my apartment manager about the whole situation.

The manager said she had asked all of our surrounding neighbors and, as it turns out, everyone had similar complaints, though no one ever said anything.

Apparently, the noise was coming from the unit NEXT to us. The manager then told me that she talked with those neighbors and informed me that they had an autistic son, and told them about the complaints.

At least they are willing to put in the effort.

They apologized and told the manager that they would try to keep the noise down and to make sure their son was taking the meds he needed.

It sounded good to me, so I left the situation confident that it would end there.

The stomping noise stopped for a few weeks until it started again.

I tried to brush it off, but after a few months, it became too much for me since I am susceptible to really bad headaches (nausea, dull pains, sensitivity to light/noise), and I finally shot another text to the manager.

I was pretty upset, because it was around June 2021 now when my initial complaint was back in February 2021.

The manager relayed the complaint over to them and the stomping, as expected, went back down.

It can be very difficult to keep up with kids, but they need to put in the effort.

This happened 2 more times w/in a 7 month period, with my last complaint in January 2022.

This morning, July 2022, I sent yet another complaint after hearing several weeks’ worth of stomping at times around 8am, 2pm, and even 5am.

I know it’s not their fault that they have an autistic son, but this apartment is also my home and I want to be able to relax without having to worry about stupidly loud noises that persist to upwards of 30 mins at a time, triggering my headaches.

I try to take painkillers and turn up the volume on the TV when I can to drown out the noise, but the vibrations travel so deep in the walls that I literally can’t ignore it.

This seems entirely justified.

I’m just upset that the parents aren’t being considerate of their neighbors, especially since they’ve gone through gaps where they’ve been successful.

So, I know my requests aren’t impossible, but maybe they’re tired too and can’t put in that kind of effort sustainably?

My gf and I are also entertaining the idea to move out by the end of 2022, but our financial situation isn’t the best and we’re currently paying $1575 for a 1BR apartment (767 sq ft) in the SoCal area.

So, AITA?

It sounds like they can keep their child under control, which seems to indicate it is their fault so the complaints aren’t unjustified.

Let’s read what the people in the comments on Reddit say about this situation.

This person has some good insights.

It does sound like the parents are at least making an effort.

Here’s a post by someone with an autistic son.

The neighbors shouldn’t have to suffer.

This person says the situation is difficult.

Autistic children can be a challenge, but you can’t let them ruin other people’s lives.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.