All parents make mistakes and do things that are hurtful to their children, but good parents always do their best.

What would you do if your Mother abandoned you for years, and then came back into your life once she had another family?

That is what happened to the kids in this story, but then just before Mother’s Day, she told them not to come see her, so they are very hurt once again.

Check it out.

AITA for refusing to visit my mother for Mother’s Day because of a hurtful comment even when she apologized?

Context: After dad passed away, our mom sent me and my siblings to live with different relatives.

After some time, she married again and had two children (12F & 15M) with Carlos, our stepdad.

Three years ago, Carlos contacted us so we could all reconnect and it has been a steady but difficult journey ever since.

We have a get together at least twice a year, once on Mother’s Day and once on November.

Wow, what kind of mother does this?

Yesterday, I (26F) woke up to a text from my older brother (30M) in our groupchat that just said “she doesn’t want us to come”.

It was a screenshot from a text from our mother that said “Hey Dani, I am telling this to you because you are the most reasonable one of them but I hope you can tell this to your siblings. It would mean a lot for me if you all could not come for Mother’s Day this year. I just want to have an uncomplicated holiday with my younger children.”

Ouch, this is very hurtful.

Then Dani asks “lol are we complicated?” and our mother says “you bring complicated feelings. I can’t look at any of you without being reminded of him and I just don’t want to cry myself to sleep like the other years in what is supposed to be my day.”

At this we all obviously cancelled our arrangements.

At night, mom called me.

She apologized, said she was just having a bad mental health day and didn’t think before she sent the text.

That of course she wanted us there for Mother’s Day.

I told her that I wouldn’t come, and that it was alright for her to not want us there but she chose the most hurtful way to say so.

She walked out on us once, she could have just stayed away.

She started crying and apologizing and I just hanged up.

She doesn’t really seem to want them there.

So, now none of us want to go to her house for Mother’s Day.

Her, Carlos and the kids have been calling and sending a lot of messages saying she is sorry and she didn’t really mean it, and I feel like a jerk for ignoring it.

Two of my older brothers say they are done with her while one of them is as conflicted as I am.

AITA?

Sometimes people really do say things that they don’t mean, but this Mom has a track record so I can’t blame them if they don’t go.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say.

Yes, Mom has done unimaginable damage to them.

This commenter suggests going no contact.

Sure, Mom went through something hard, but she should have been there for her kids.

No decent person would do this.

This person points out that Mom was the one causing the ‘complicated’ feelings.

Talk about heartless.

This Mom abandoned her kids when they were little, and is now pushing them away again as adults.

This is inexcusable.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.