When our parents are struggling it’s normal to want to help out.

But there’s a point at which ‘helping out’ goes from a kindness to a duty, and when you don’t have the autonomy to make your own choices, that can very easily become abuse.

Unfortunately, that’s exactly what the teenage girl in this story found out when she tried to have a life that didn’t include caring for her sister 24/7.

Read on to find out what happened to completely burn out this teenager.

WIBTA if I told my mom I’m burned out from basically being a third parent and just want my own life?

I (17, female) have basically been helping raise my seven year old sister for the past three years. I cook for her, dress her, feed her, clean up after her, help manage her emotions, and share a room with her.

Anytime something goes wrong like she makes a mess, throws a tantrum, or misbehaves it’s automatically my fault because I “wasn’t watching her.”

If her side of the room is messy? My fault. If she wets the bed (which she still does sometimes)? Still my fault.

We have bunk beds, and her whiz literally drips down onto my bed. I’m the one who sleeps in that room, and it smells like whiz constantly.

Yikes! Read on to find out how this older sister’s situation gets worse and worse.

My mom says it’s my job to hand-wash her clothes (we don’t have a washer/dryer and haven’t done laundry in over a month), and if I don’t, then I’m “not being responsible.”

Meanwhile, my older brother works night shifts and doesn’t help at all.

My mom and stepdad get time away from my sister, but I never do. Even on vacations, I’m still stuck with her, sharing a room, being her default caretaker.

No one ever says thank you. Every once in a while I’ll get a “we appreciate you,” but it doesn’t really mean much when nothing changes.

So she tried to seize an opportunity to make her life better.

On top of all that, I’ve been trying to get a job.

I’ve applied to five places in the last few days and have already been rejected by all of them.

It’s really weighing on me, because I want to be able to make my own money and gain some freedom.

But I already know if I do get hired and my mom can’t find childcare, they’ll expect me to just stay home and keep watching my sister instead of working.

Then one thing happened that pushed her to breaking point.

Today really sent me over the edge.

I got ready for church, but wasn’t allowed to go because my sister smelled like whiz and somehow, that was my fault too.

The one guy I’ve been talking to (who I barely get to see because of how busy we both are) was going to be there, and I missed seeing him again.

Let’s see how she was feeling in the aftermath.

It just feels like no one sees me as a kid anymore. I’m tired, I’m overwhelmed, and honestly I feel completely unappreciated.

I want to sit my mom down and tell her I can’t keep being the one everyone leans on. That I need to be able to live my own life without constantly being blamed for everything my sister does.

But I hate expressing stuff like this. Every time I try, my chest gets tight and I feel like I’m going to cry or shut down. I don’t want to be seen as ungrateful or start a fight, I just want to be heard.

WIBTA?

There’s no two ways about it: this teenage girl is being abused by her parents.

This isn’t just a little bit of babysitting here and there – she is completely parentified, being made to cater to her sister’s complex needs.

She’s clearly long said goodbye to any semblance of a childhood for herself.

Let’s see what Reddit thought about this.

This person backed her up.

While many Redditors encouraged her to get external help.

And others suggested some steps she could take at home.

This daughter is being completely taken advantage of, and it’s not okay.

It’s commendable that she loves her sister, but taking care of a sibling is not a duty, it should be a choice.

As for washing her sister’s clothes and cleaning up her mess?

That’s not her job.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.