Pexels/Reddit
In a big shared house that’s quickly getting even more crowded, one roommate finds themselves in a bizarre debate: their private, paid-for bathroom is suddenly being eyed as a backup option—just because of their assigned gender at birth.
What started as a chill living arrangement is turning into a turf war over toilet access.
Read on for the story.
AITA for not sharing my private bathroom with roommates
Im a 22 yr old amab non binary person, i live in a big shared house with originally 4 other people.
The way the house lay out works is 3 floors with the second one having a main bathroom and all 4 of my roommates rooms and the third being my room which is like a bigger loft room with a private bathroom right in the middle of it (i pay extra for the bigger room and bathroom).
Everything had been going pretty smoothly up till recently.
Here’s where it gets juicy…
The “issue” I guess you could say started with one roommate who was supposed to move out ended up staying and moved in with her boyfriend (who was already subleasing a room last lease so he was one of the original 4).
Another roommate’s boyfriend is also living with us temporarily, though no one gave me a clear timeframe for how long. And we’re adding a new roommate to fill the spot we thought would be vacant.
So now, instead of five people using the shared bathroom, there are seven.
Now, the roommates want to switch up who uses what bathroom.
Now some of my roommates are making comments suggesting that their boyfriends should be able to use my bathroom. The reasoning is basically that I was “assigned male at birth,” so it supposedly makes more sense for their boyfriends to use my space than the main floor bathroom.
It sorta feels like they’re trying to gradually justify this as a communal solution. And while I’m usually fine with our house being a very shared, open environment, I draw the line at my actual bedroom being treated like a public access bathroom.
Now to be clear I was told about the additional people moving in and I said it was fine, since I have my own space and assumed that wouldn’t really affect me. But now it’s starting to feel like I’m being expected to make compromises I never agreed to, in the name of convenience for everyone else.
Boundaries are vital.
I’m planning to set a firm boundary and let them know that my bathroom is private, full stop. But I can already see them acting like I’m being unhelpful or overprotective of my space.
AITA for refusing to let my roommates’ boyfriends use my bathroom, even though I agreed to the added housemates and they think it makes sense because of my assigned gender at birth?
Are the roommates making a reasonable request, or is OP right to refuse to share?
Reddit was quick to flush out the nonsense.
This person says NTA, and has a suggestion.
This person says gender isn’t even relevant here, and OP’s feelings are valid.
And this person says this is all just intrusive and not fair.
They paid for a private bathroom, not to be everyone’s backup plan with plumbing.
If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.
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