Weddings and concerts both book up fast—but when they land on the same weekend? Things get messy. Especially when it’s your cousin’s big day… and your partner’s favorite artist’s last-ever show.

She thought they’d RSVP’d to love and loyalty. He thought he was owed a night of bass drops and lasers.

Now, they’re both wondering who’s really out of tune.

AITA for asking my partner to attend my cousin’s wedding over a concert?

My (28F) cousin is getting married in September.

This cousin is someone I grew up with, she’s 4 years younger than me and she and I have always been the “babies”of the family as we’re the youngest two of 8 grandchildren.

We haven’t been as close these days, she lives in Illinois and I live in Colorado, but growing up we’d spend so much time together, so I still consider her close and important to me.

Cousins are the best in that way.

My partner (33M) was included on my RSVP “yes” months ago. I know RSVPs are important to those planning the wedding because sometimes you have to pay per meal when it comes to catering and sometimes it can be pretty expensive per person how you’re doing it .

Idk what the deal is for this wedding specifically as I haven’t been involved in any planning, but we’ve already said we’d both be there.

Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago, Tipper announced his final two-day concert series at Red Rocks – he’s retiring after those shows. Of course, it’s the same weekend as the wedding.

Oh no!

We’re totally going to night two, we’ve invited my brother and some friends to go with for this last hoorah, there’s no question about attending the second night.

But now my partner is giving me grief about “why do I have to go to that wedding, I want to go to tipper.”

I explain that she’s family, we were close growing up, she’s important to me, and as my partner she’s like basically his family too. “But I’ve never even met her.”

That makes it even worse.

Well I’m sure he has, he’s only been to a couple of family gatherings and since my cousin doesn’t live here she wasn’t at the most recent but I’m POSITIVE she was at the one before that for Christmas. I even asked her and she confirmed.

But my partner insists he has no reason to be at the wedding and should be attending Tipper instead. I understand the importance of the concert to him, as this is like his favorite artist and will be the last time he performs there ever, but we’re going to be there on the second night which will be EPIC still.

AITA for asking that he join me at the wedding instead?

One thing’s for sure—this couple is dancing to very different beats.

Most people on Reddit called the boyfriend selfish.

This person makes the point that he’s still GOING, so he has no reason to whine.

This person agrees…he’s definitely in the wrong.

And this person was torn at first but no…just no.

Tipper’s retiring and apparently so is her partner’s sense of commitment.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.