Family obligations can feel impossible when disrespect keeps piling up.

So, what would you do if a family member wrecked your credit score, freeloaded at your house, and then invited you to their wedding expecting a gift? Would you go anyway because it’s the right thing to do? Or would you finally draw a line and refuse to play along?

In today’s story, one woman faces this decision and chooses to stay home. Here’s the full scoop.

AITA for skipping my husband’s cousin’s wedding and refuse to gift them anything?

Since the beginning of our relationship, I have learned that my husband is the family’s go-to person when it comes to money. Let’s call them “Team Priorities.”

Once we got serious and started a family of our own, we agreed to stop the handouts. We’re not wealthy by any means, but when we’re in a tight spot, we hustle and make it work without asking others for help.

But every now and then, “Team Priorities” sneaks back in and asks my husband to help cover a bill or some urgent expense. The frustrating part is the timing—shortly after asking for money, the fiancée is often posting about new outfits, day trips, or looking for tattoo artists. It’s hard not to feel taken advantage of.

It turns out that they were only using them for a place to stay.

Their latest visit really frustrated me.

They said they wanted to come see us so the kids could spend time together (they’re close in age). We agreed and let them stay with us, thinking it was for quality family time. Wrong. They treated our house like a free Airbnb.

We saw them one full day and briefly in the evenings—otherwise, they were off doing their own thing. Our daughter was really disappointed, which left me annoyed and, honestly, a little sour.

Then came the kicker.

Then, the car loan her husband co-signed on became the problem.

A week after they left, my husband got an alert that his credit score dropped 30 points. It turns out his cousin (the groom) missed a car payment. My husband co-signed that loan before we ever met. So they came to stay with us, knowing they were in default, and didn’t say a word. Meanwhile, that missed payment affected our financial standing.

I was livid.

I wanted to message the fiancée and tell her to get their act together because it’s beyond disrespectful. My husband and I argued about it. He said I shouldn’t get involved and that the fiancée has nothing to do with the loan.

But we’ve tried to get him removed from the loan and can’t—his cousin’s credit is too low. I even asked why the fiancée (soon-to-be wife!) couldn’t take over the loan, but my husband brushed it off, saying there’s only a year left.

Now, she refuses to go to the wedding and doesn’t think there should be a gift.

After sitting with it, I decided I’m not attending their wedding.

My husband is still going—he’s the best man. But our daughter is starting kindergarten that same week, and I don’t want her to miss those first days. Plus, she’s attending private school, so every penny counts. I made it clear there will be no gift from us, and he won’t be footing the entire bill for the bachelor trip either.

If it weren’t for the kids, I’d have stepped back from this relationship a long time ago. The fiancée gives off strong narcissistic/toxic vibes—but that’s another post.

AITA?

Wow! Her husband sounds like he’s way too nice!

Let’s see what the folks over at Reddit have to say about this whole situation.

This reader is on her side.

These are great questions.

For this person, the focus is on why she’d rather confront the fiancée over the cousin.

Here’s a great way to handle it.

The husband needs to wake up. It’s clear that he’s being taken advantage of, and unfortunately, he’s the only one who can stop it.

If you liked that post, check out this post about a rude customer who got exactly what they wanted in their pizza.