When you are dating someone who is about to have a difficult day, it is good to do everything you can to support them and be there for them.

What would you do if you had made plans to help distract your boyfriend on the anniversary of his sister’s death, but then things happened at work that made it so you were too tired?

That is what happened to the girlfriend in this story, so she had to cancel and now he is upset, but she feels like her reason for canceling is legitimate.

AITA for canceling “loose” plans because of lack of sleep, after working 3 straight days of 12+ hours a days with a two hour trip there and back each day?

To start this off I do feel like a jerk, but also wish I had some empathy and understanding for the support I can physically/mentally provide even if it’s not EXACTLY what my boyfriend wants.

Being sad on a day like that is totally understandable.

Today is the 6 year anniversary of my boyfriend’s oldest sisters death and while driving to work yesterday he told me “just so you know I’ll probably be sad all day tomorrow.”

I responded with “your sister wouldn’t want you to sit and dwell all day, so if I get paid let’s go do something, even if I don’t get paid maybe we can go on a hike or something free.”

It sounds like he is really looking forward to it.

He loved that idea.

The problem came up when I did not get paid, I had to drive 2 hours back home today after a 12 hour work day last night and my friend let me stay with them (thankfully) last night but they had to be up early, so I got 3 hours of sleep before I had to drive home and I just got home 3.5 hours ago.

At least they got to relax together.

I ordered him wings when I got home and sat with him while he picked the show we watched.

After 3 hours of watching the show he says ok let’s go, I try to muster up any energy to go but I just can’t.

She is just too tired to go for that hike.

Eventually say, “I’m so sorry I know I promised but I’m dying here! Can we please stay in today and we can watch anything you want to watch but I have no energy after working 3 days straight 2 hours away from our house, driving back and forth the first two days after working 12 hours and now on 3 hours of sleep, and just arrived home for my first day off in a minute.”

He does not work but takes care of my dogs while I have to be gone so long. I also only have $7 in my bank account and 10 miles to empty in my car until I get paid, which I thought would be sooner.

It is understandable that he is disappointed and upset, but also that she just can’t do it right now.

But here I am with no money, no sleep, and my boyfriend is mad at me because I broke the loose promises of going out to get his mind off his sisters death but won’t listen to anything I have to say. All he hears is I’m a liar and a jerk.

AITA?

This is one of those difficult situations where both parties are completely justified in their actions and responses, but it doesn’t make it any easier. Just one of those bad days that can’t be avoided sometimes.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say about it.

This isn’t really relevant, but he should have a job.

Yup, neither party is doing anything wrong.

Exactly, it is really this simple.

Honestly, it was her responsibility once she promised to help him.

This commenter is spot on.

Sometimes things don’t go according to plan, and it is ok to be disappointed.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.