In a good marriage, a couple decides together who will do what when it comes to household chores and how much each person will contribute to the bills.

If you were married to someone who didn’t have a job but you did have a job and paid all the bills, would you expect them to do all the household chores?

The wife in today’s story decided this would be a fair way to split things up, but the problem is how her husband handles the cleaning.

Let’s read the whole story.

I’ve intentionally NOT cleaned our house for the past year

My husband claims to be a germaphobe, but lives like a slob.

We separated (but never officially divorced) in 2020.

I truly loved living alone with my pets, but am admittedly not the best housekeeper.

Laundry is always piled up and the dishes don’t get washed until I can actually fill the dishwasher. I don’t sweep/mop as often as I should, but will make a generous effort if expecting company.

Her husband really does sound like a germaphobe.

So back in 2022 we reconnected and rekindled our relationship, and decided to move back in together.

His OCD (which I have recently learned to call it) is extremely frustrating.

He MUST wash or sanitize his hands after touching anything that’s been on the floor, money, his wallet, etc. I am required to do the same.

Any piece of clothing that has been worn outside of the bedroom (ie. his “safe space”) even if only for an hour, has to go immediately into the laundry.

Their work situation is far from equal.

He hasn’t had a legit job in over a year. Some under-the-table work for a while, started two different server jobs and was fired within a few weeks.

I work full time and pay at least 90% of the bills (this was still the case before we split).

So for the past year I decided that if he is gonna be a SAHH I’m not going to do the housework.

For a germaphobe, he sure doesn’t care about a clean house!

Guys, our house is disgraceful and I’d be mortified if anyone came to visit.

The floors haven’t been cleaned in months. The garbage is overflowing before it gets taken out.

Last week we got a notice in the mail about our unkempt lawn.

I cave in and clean the bathroom when he leaves skid marks in the toilet or when the sink or shower starts looking gross but I legitimately can’t tell if he just doesn’t notice these things, doesn’t care, or just knows that eventually I’ll take care of them so he won’t have to.

She should point this out to her husband. If he doesn’t notice, she should make it clear that she does notice.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

This person asks a good question.

Here’s another similar comment.

Perhaps he really does have OCD.

Here’s the perspective of someone who has OCD.

Perhaps there’s another issue besides OCD.

She really needs to confront her husband and possibly have him see a doctor.

Their whole relationship is a mess.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.