Many older people are not comfortable accepting help without offering something in return.

See why this husband and wife disagree about how to deal with her father’s reciprocation.

AITAH For not accepting money from my wife?

My Mother in law passed away a few months ago and my father in law lives alone.

She used to make meals for both of them but now my father in law lives alone and he is not very capable of cooking, so my wife makes extra meals for him every now and then.

That’s not all his wife wants to do.

I have absolutely no problem with that and I’m very proud of her for stepping up because she has two other sisters who don’t help very much.

One day, my wife came to me and gave me money which she said was from her dad (my father in law).

She said its to cover expenses for the meals we’ve been giving him for the past month.

I told her I can’t accept this money and that he doesn’t need to pay for anything and I’m glad to help anyway I can.

This prompted her to speak up for her father’s pride.

She got a little mad and said she can’t bring back the money because that would hurt his feelings and that she already took it.

I’m not sure where to go from here. Should I just accept the money?

I love my father in law and I want to help any way I can because I know he is going through a tough time.

Here is what folks are saying.

Simple! Groceries are pricey now.

My granddad was the same. Remember: these folks grew up in the depression.

Lovely idea, but he’d want to pay for that, too!

Exactly. Graciously is the perfect word.

It’s important to retain some independence.

They could open an account and invest it to go toward his care or other needs.

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