Living in another country can feel isolating, especially when you can’t speak the language you’re most comfortable with.

So when one young man finally met a neighbor who spoke his native tongue, it felt like finding a piece of home.

But as their friendship grew, his wife who didn’t speak the language began to feel like an outsider in her own living room.

Read on for the full story.

AITA for speaking Polish with my friend even though my wife doesn’t understand it?

I’m 26M, from Poland. My wife is British (26F). We first met in college and got married in February 2025.

Soon after, we moved to a new apartment in London.

Honestly, it feels lonely and a little stressful when you don’t have anyone to talk to in your native language in real life.

Luckily, he finally met someone who would change this.

Recently, a Polish guy moved onto our floor. I’m extremely happy because he’s an awesome guy with whom I can speak Polish face-to-face. It feels like a part of my homeland has come with me.

Naturally, we’ve become good friends and spend time together almost daily. It’s not like I’m spending less time with my wife now — I’ve just cut down on my screen time.

Lately his wife has been hanging out with both of them.

My wife loves socializing too, but since we’re kinda new to this place, she doesn’t have many people to talk to — just 2–3 friends she meets sometimes on weekends.

So, whenever my friend and I are together, she often joins us in the room.

She doesn’t love it that they speak a language she can’t understand.

She recently told me she feels left out when we talk in Polish and wants me to use English too while speaking to him.

The problem is, it’s honestly hard and awkward for both of us. I tried but always ended up slipping back into full Polish mode.

To him, it’s such a breath of fresh air to speak his language without having to translate.

In the whole city, this guy is the only person I can talk to in my own language. It’s such a big comfort. It isn’t just about convenience — it’s a kind of emotional grounding.

It helps me feel connected to home and reduces the loneliness that comes from always operating in a second language. It’s the only place where I can fully express humor and feelings without translation fatigue.

His wife doesn’t seem to understand, though.

But she’s unhappy about it because she knows I’m not honestly trying to switch to English with him. I even told her that it’s hard for me to do that.

AITA?

What felt like connection to him, felt like exclusion to her.

What did Reddit think?

This user thinks that unless you speak multiple languages, you don’t really understand the feeling of “translation fatigue.”

This commenter thinks if his wife wants to be included in the conversation, she needs to meet him halfway.

Just because they’re married doesn’t mean they can’t do certain things apart.

They shouldn’t be expected to bend over backwards to accommodate her in a hangout she wasn’t initially a part of.

He’s not wrong for leaning into the connection he’s been searching for so long for.

When you get an opportunity like this, you have to take it.

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