Imagine dealing with a couple different medical diagnoses that leave you feeling exhausted a lot of the time.

If you were dating someone who wasn’t very understanding and made comments that they claimed were advice but you took as criticism, would you keep dating them, or break up?

In this story, one woman is in this situation. While she cares about her boyfriend, she really can’t handle his “advice” anymore.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITAH for calling my partner a “discount Dad” after he kept treating me like a child instead of a partner, even though I’m dealing with severe health issues

I (18F) have been dating my boyfriend let’s call him Jake (24M) for a little under a year.

At first, things were really good. He seemed emotionally stable, mature, grounded all the things I thought I wanted after dealing with a lot of chaotic guys my own age.

We met through mutual friends and clicked pretty quickly.

He said he liked how “mature” I was and how “together” I seemed for my age, which felt nice to hear, especially since I came out of a very abusive household.

Her opinion about Jake has shifted over time.

I won’t lie I felt flattered at first.

I thought we had an understanding that yes, I’m younger, but I’m still an equal in this relationship.

But over the months, that dynamic has really started to shift, and now I’m not sure I’m being treated like a partner at all.

She’s dealing with a couple health issues.

For some background: I’ve been diagnosed with endometriosis and POTS (postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome). Both conditions affect my daily life in big ways.

I deal with chronic fatigue, dizziness, and a lot of pain. There are days when I physically can’t get out of bed without struggling, and managing my symptoms takes a lot of mental energy on top of everything else.

Jake knows this.

He was supportive…at first.

I was upfront about it from the beginning. And at first, he was really kind and supportive.

But over time, he’s started acting like he knows better than me how I should be living my life.

It started small comments about how much I sleep or how I manage my symptoms but now it’s like I can’t do anything without some kind of lecture or judgment.

He really does act like he knows better than she does how to manager her symptoms.

Some examples: If I sleep in to manage a flareup: “That’s not healthy. You need structure or you’ll never be independent.”

If I get food delivered on a day I’m too fatigued to cook: “You’re wasting money and being lazy.”

If I cancel plans because of pain: “You’ll never build resilience if you give in every time.”

Even if I lie down after standing too long and feel dizzy (a POTS symptom), he tells me I should push through because “resting too much makes it worse.”

He doesn’t like how she dresses either.

He also makes comments about my outfits being “too revealing” or “not appropriate.”

And when I tell him I don’t want unsolicited advice, he says he’s just trying to “help me grow” or “teach me how to be an adult.”

But I am an adult just one managing two chronic illnesses on top of everything else.

He criticized her again.

Things came to a head last week.

I was having a rough few days a bad endo flare, zero energy, and could barely sit upright for long.

He came over and saw that I’d been resting most of the day and immediately launched into another long-winded talk about “discipline” and “life habits” and how I need to stop relying on rest as a “crutch.”

I’d had enough.

She told him how she really felt about his advice.

So I said not even shouting, just tired “I didn’t agree to date a discount dad. If I wanted someone to supervise my life and tell me how I’m failing, I’d move back in with my parents.”

He went completely silent. Left my apartment, and didn’t talk to me for two days.

When he finally did, he said I “crossed a line,” that he was “just trying to help,” and that I had “no idea how hard it is to support someone who won’t even try.”

I was honestly stunned.

He’s gotten his friends and family to back him up.

Now his friends are messaging me saying I’m selfish and too immature to handle a relationship with a real adult.

His mum (yes, his actual mother) messaged me saying she’s “disappointed” and that Jake has always been the kind of guy who “lifts women up.”

I just want to be clear, I do try. Every day is hard with these conditions. I work, I cook when I can, I handle my appointments, I advocate for myself in medical systems that constantly brush me off.

She does not appreciate his criticism.

I don’t think I need to be “raised” by a man who thinks being six years older makes him my life coach.

I care about him, but I also feel like I’ve been slowly shoved into the role of “student” or “child” in this relationship and I’m starting to wonder if that was his intention from the beginning.

AITA for calling my boyfriend a discount dad after months of being treated like a project instead of a person?

I’m not sure that he sees her as a child, but I do think he needs to stop giving her “advice.” He clearly doesn’t know what’s best for her, and their relationship probably isn’t going to last.

She needs to be with someone who actually is supportive and not judgmental.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

This person urges her to run.

He is definitely controlling.

Isn’t it ironic?

This person calls him a predator.

She needs to get out of this relationship.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.