When a man agreed to watch his sister’s kids overnight so she and her husband could finally spend an anniversary together before his six-week military assignment, everything seemed fine—until a last-minute hockey date came up.

Thinking it was no big deal, he backed out, assuming she’d find a backup sitter. Instead, she broke down, saying he’d not only ruined their plans but disappointed her kids, too.

Read on for the story.

AITAH for not being able to babysit my sister’s kids?

People involved are myself (32M), my sister “Sally” (29F), and her husband “Joe” (31M).

Less than 6 weeks ago, Sally asked me if I’d be able to babysit their kids (8 & 6) overnight tonight for her and Joe to see a show a couple of hours away and get a hotel room.

It’s their anniversary this weekend, and Joe is military and leaving on a 6 week long TDY Friday morning. I told her I could, I really don’t mind babysitting on the rare occasion she asks and my nephews are pretty cool kids.

All good so far.

Well yesterday a girl I’ve been talking to for a while invited me to see a game tonight as well, and I accepted the invitation. One, I love hockey, and two, I really like this girl and think this could have a lot of potential.

I called Sally after work yesterday and told her I can no longer babysit because I have plans now.

She went from 0-60 on me about how I made a commitment to her and she’s already bought the tickets and prepaid for the hotel room so they can’t get a refund with less than 24 hours notice.

Not cool.

I countered that it’s not my fault she wasn’t prepared enough to have a backup plan because what if I’d gotten sick or into a car wreck?

She started crying and called me a jerk so I ended the call because I have a strict boundary with everyone that I won’t deal with emotional manipulation tactics.

Joe called me late last night and offered to buy the tickets to take my date to a game on a different day if I would ask for a rain check on tonight so I could still watch their kids because the military has made it to where they’ve spent all of their anniversaries apart and Sally has been looking forward to this night away together.

Wow.

I reiterated to him that it’s their responsibility as parents to have a backup plan in case things fall through and I’m not responsible for his choice in career, not their choice to have children. He said he was disappointed but thankfully ended the call respectfully.

I assumed that would be the end of it until I woke up just now to a text from my sister telling me she’s “incredibly hurt” by the way I’m behaving.

Not just “screwing their plans” but for “letting the boys down” because I spoke to them about our sleepover on the weekend and they’ve been “so excited to hang out with their uncle”.

Enjoy the salt to the wound.

I honestly don’t understand how they can’t see that it’s THEIR responsibility to have a backup plan in case I became unavailable.

At this point idk how to even respond because she’s so clouded by her emotions on this situation that I don’t think she can see rationality even if I respond, but before I say anything I’m curious to see other opinions on if I’m justified here.

AITA?

Reddit ruled YTA, saying he went back on his word for something trivial and left his sister in an impossible position. And they are MAD.

This person can’t even believe this story is real.

This person calls him every bad name in the book.

This person teases, thinking how good he could’ve looked to this girl. He just looks like a total jerk now.

Turns out, ditching family plans for a first date might score points in romance, but it tanks your sibling reputation fast.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.