When you have a large extended family, it can be understandably difficult to arrange for them to all be in one place at one time.

But with a little flexibility from everyone, it’s absolutely not impossible for enjoyable family events to be arranged with everyone involved.

So when the woman in this story tried to arrange a date for family photos, she was prepared to be flexible and provide sufficient notice to ensure that everyone could attend the agreed-upon appointment.

But when her sister-in-law asked to reschedule not once, but twice, she felt the need to call her out.

Read on to find out what went down between them.

AITA for not postponing family pictures?

In March, my husband’s family decided to give their stepmother a thoughtful gift: a professional family photo session.

I organized the arrangements, hiring a photographer (a distant relative of mine) and scheduling the session for May. Two families from out of town made travel plans to participate.

About three weeks before the scheduled date, my sister-in-law and her husband (my husband’s brother) requested to postpone.

They explained they had overlooked a prior commitment for their son that conflicted with the session.

Let’s see how this changed the wider family’s plans.

They asked to reschedule in October when my stepmom-in-law would be out for a visit again. They also asked that the rescheduled photos be held after 2 p.m. since their son’s birthday party would be the day before, and they wanted time for potential overnight guests to leave.

In the end, no guests stayed overnight, but the photos were still rescheduled for October to accommodate them.

Two weeks before the new date, my sister-in-law reached out again asking to postpone a second time.

She said she had been feeling under a lot of stress, possibly related to perimenopause, and was struggling with her self-image, which affected her mental health.

Read on to find out how the woman reacted to this call.

I was understanding but explained that other family members had already made travel arrangements, the photographer had been booked with a deposit, and I didn’t feel comfortable rescheduling again.

My sister-in-law then called our stepmother-in-law, the gift recipient, to ask if she’d be okay delaying the session until April, when she would next be visiting.

The stepmother agreed, wanting to be supportive of how my sister-in-law was feeling.

Because I couldn’t cancel with the photographer again and my husband’s sister and niece already had travel plans, I suggested a compromise: moving forward with a “grandkids-only” photo as a partial fulfilment of the original plan.

But that wasn’t good enough for the sister-in-law.

However, my sister-in-law viewed this as a temporary substitute and expected the full family photos to take place in April.

When I mentioned the additional costs and logistics this would create, she offered to pay for the second shoot, though that didn’t address the inconvenience for others who would need to travel again.

My husband’s sister and I both felt another session wasn’t practical, but I didn’t want to directly tell my sister-in-law that.

So she decided to try a different approach.

I asked if she might be willing to briefly join one group photo and skip the individual family shots, so the stepmother could still have the promised family picture.

I also offered the option of her being photoshopped in later, using a photo of her choice. My sister-in-law became emotional and declined, preferring to wait until April when she felt she’d be in a better place personally.

With no resolution, and her husband also unwilling to participate in photos without her, the family decided to cancel the session altogether.

My husband, his sister, and I agreed that I would use the booking for photos with my own side of the family, so the photographer wouldn’t lose the deposit.

AITA?

It’s always difficult to bring large groups of people together since everyone has very hectic schedules.

But when a booking has been made and all parties have agreed, it’s important that it is stuck to – especially if people have long-distance travel plans that would be inconvenienced.

Sure the sister-in-law is struggling right now, but the plans have already been changed for her convenience, and it’s a lot to ask for them to be moved again.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit thought about this.

This person agreed that her multiple excuses were hugely disruptive.

While others thought the sister-in-law was creating needless drama.

Meanwhile, this Redditor thought it was a sign that this woman should leave organizing family events to others, to save her from the hassle again.

She’s absolutely clueless.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.