Sometimes people get so hung up on “simple answers” that they forget real life isn’t really simple at all.

So what would you do if a relative demanded a strict yes-or-no response to an emotional family question, even though your own experience made the topic way more complicated than that? Would you just stay quiet? Or would you explain your feelings?

In the following story, one cousin finds herself in this situation and decides to give an honest answer. Here’s what happened.

AITA for refusing to give a simple yes/no answer during a family discussion?

So I was sitting with my cousin (R), my aunt, my mom, my grandma, and another cousin (M). My aunt was talking about some guy on social media who’s always negative about people, but she mentioned one thing he said that she kinda agreed with.

She asked us, “Can a mom make her kids hate their dad after a divorce?”

Everyone said “yes” and stayed quiet. I also said “yes,” but I said it depends.

She explained her thoughts.

I told them something like, “Yeah, but it depends on the situation. Like if my dad before the divorce was really awful to my mom and hurt her emotionally and basically made her life miserable, then of course I’d hate him.”

Then, I continued, “At the end of the day, a mom is such a strong part of your life, and I don’t want my mom hurt or sad. But if that same dad treated me totally differently, like he was actually super good to me as his daughter, then my feelings wouldn’t be simple.”

I finished by saying, “I’d still hate him for everything he did to my mom, but I’d also have this weird love because he treats me well. So it becomes this mix of love and hate at the same time.”

Her cousin felt differently.

R said she could never love her dad if he hurt her mom, even if he treated her nicely. And she kept trying to convince me to think the same way

I told her, “Everyone has their own life experiences, and people see things differently. We’re not sheep that all think the same, I’m just talking from what I’ve lived through.”

She got annoyed and said she only wanted a yes-or-no answer, not explanations.

For her, it really depends on the audience.

I told her I can’t just say yes or no without saying why. Some topics aren’t that simple.

Then she said I was wrong and that if someone in life (even at work) asks a yes-or-no question, I should answer yes or no, not go into details.

I told her it depends on where you are, who you’re talking to, and what the situation is. A family conversation isn’t the same as a work conversation.

AITA?

Wow! Her cousin sounds like something else.

Let’s see how the folks over at Reddit feel about this situation.

This person doesn’t see that she did anything wrong.

According to this comment, life is not black and white.

Here’s an interesting point.

This is so true.

She can answer the way she wants. Her cousin needs to learn to agree to disagree.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.