Imagine being a young adult struggling with your mental health. If your parents gave you a date by which you needed to get a job and move out, would that be motivating or so triggering you couldn’t even think straight?

In this story, one person is in this exact situation, and they feel the second way. The parents aren’t backing down, and they’re not sure what to do.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITA for saying I was blindsided by what my dad and step mom did?

I’m a 22 year old and my dad is 50 while my step mom is 47.

I have really struggled with mental health problems my whole life and last year it got bad and I was in treatment for months.

I was in family therapy with my dad at some point, we have had a lot of differences for many (many) years.

These sound like good goals.

Since I got back from treatment my dad and SM have been very adamant that they want me to get a job (which I have now and have had for months which I’m proud of myself for) and move out.

Which like I don’t have a problem with as it would be cool for me to work towards finally be able to be okay enough to be on my own.

However a couple months ago my dad and SM sat me down with them in the living and gave me a contract.

There was one big surprise on the contract.

There was a lot of things on the contract that honestly I dont really mind like getting a job, doing chores etc.

But then they wrote that I needed to be out of the house by January 1st.

This threw me off because I have talked to my dad multiple times that having time crunches especially with huge changes can really trigger me and make me spiral.

Now of course that is a me problem and I know I have to deal with that and I am working on getting better with my emotions it’s been a struggle for years.

It was definitely triggering.

I was honestly completely blindsided, I wasn’t really sure what to do and my brain immediately just turned off.

This happens very often when me and my dad have any sort of conversation by brain just immediately goes to dissociation, which annoys me to no end as I become unable to really talk or think if I’m being honest.

After they gave me the contract they made me sign it. My therapist and case manager both agree this is kinda insane but I’m not really sure.

OP snapped.

Anyway flash forward to about two weeks ago and my dad calls me as I’m heading to work and he just kinds says a bunch of hurtful things.

During the call which if I’m being honest was him just talking at me about the things I do that upset him, a very normal phone call. But then he said that if I moved in with my mom he would consider that a failure which made me snap slightly.

This is were I said some things along the side of “well you don’t get to have an option like that when you blindsided me with your contract” and then I know I said that what he said was mean.

I know that I shouldn’t have snapped at him I can totally see how I am a jerk for that.

It wasn’t over.

But when I got home from work him and my SM both said that, that it was a very hurtful thing to say and that I shouldn’t have been blindsided and I should have seen this coming.

The three of us have talked about me moving out before as my dad always says he doesn’t want me living with him till I’m 30 which makes no sense to me but okay sure.

I would also not like to live with you till I’m 30, if im being honest I dont even want to live with him now.

I’m unsure what to do they both have been mad so am I a jerk?

It sounds like OP needs help. While a goal of moving out is great, January 1st may not be attainable due to mental health and financial issues.

Let’s see what Reddit has to say about this story.

Here’s a vote for moving in with the mom.

This is a good point.

Here’s a similar comment.

This person doesn’t think OP did anything wrong.

If someone doesn’t like hearing the truth, that’s their problem.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.