Protecting your family can push you into confrontations you never imagined having with a friend.

So, what would you do if a friend staying in your home started making demands to a close family member over the time and money she spends on your child with special needs?

Would you act as everyone’s support system and smooth things over? Or would you lay down the law and tell your friend to stay in her lane?

In the following story, one mother finds herself in this situation and decides to stand up for her family. Here’s what happened.

AITA for threatening to make my friend homeless

My husband and I have 4 kids: Eloise (12), Margot (9), Mateo (7), and James (4). Eloise and Mateo were adopted, and Margot and James are our biological children.

Eloise has special needs. She has autism, hearing loss in both ears, and a few other diagnoses. She receives daily PT, OT, and speech therapy at school.

Eloise’s biological aunt, Julia, is heavily involved in Eloise’s life. She picks Eloise up from school 2 days a week and takes her to the trampoline park, her favorite indoor playground, or swimming.

Eloise tries to include the rest of the kids.

Eloise also spends one night a week at Julia’s house, and Julia has a key to our house so she can drop in and see Eloise whenever she’s available.

Julia also brings Eloise lots and lots of gifts. They‘re always either clothes that meet her sensory needs and current interests, toys that manage to sneak PT and OT into play, toys for sensory play, or tools for self-regulation (coloring books, new headphones, new water bottles, and chewable toys).

She usually brings something for the other kids, but it’s typically much smaller, like a smaller coloring book and pack of crayons, a small box of play-dough, or a theater box of candy for each kid.

Alexa is living with them temporarily.

One of my friends, Alexa, and her 3 kids (10f, 6m, 5m) are living with us for 6 months while Alexa gets back on her feet following a divorce. We split childcare for everyone but Eloise relatively evenly and agreed that the kids would be treated equally.

Julia continues to visit Eloise and bring her new clothes and toys, plus small gifts for the other kids (including Alexa’s kids), but the differences in the gifts and the amount of attention given to Eloise have been bothering Alexa.

She asked me to stop Julia from bringing Eloise such extravagant gifts, from taking Eloise out without the other kids, and from taking back her house key so she can’t visit as often. I told her that Julia is family and I don’t plan to change anything about her visits.

Here’s where she may’ve been too harsh.

Alexa then went to Julia and told her to stop taking Eloise out without the other kids and to stop bringing all these expensive gifts without getting equal ones for the other kids, and suggested that Eloise would be happier if they spent more time at Julia’s house.

Julia came to me and told me everything Alexa said. When Alexa confirmed everything, I told her that if she pulled this again, she would be out of my house, and I would personally drop her kids off with her ex-husband.

Alexa has profusely apologized, but she is upset that I’m threatening to make her homeless and take her kids away. My husband thinks I might have been a little harsh.

AITA?

Yikes! It’s easy to see why she blew up like that.

Let’s check out what the people over at Reddit think about everything going on.

According to this comment, the woman is going to do it to herself.

Here’s someone who points out how much Julia helps.

Exactly!

It does sound like she was jealous.

Alexa needs to stay in her lane.

Everything she did was just wrong, and she deserved to be called out.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.