Back in the day, the wife stayed home to cook, clean and raise the kids while the husband went off to work and paid all the bills. Boy have times changed!

Now, many couples both work, cook, clean, and help out with the kids. But in some cases, there’s complete roll reversal where the wife works and pays the bills while the husband is a stay-at-home dad.

In this story, a boyfriend and girlfriend are living together, and they started out pooling their money to pay the bills. However, now the girlfriend is paying all the bills herself along with cooking and cleaning. She was okay with this arrangement at first, but now, things have changed.

You might wonder what exactly the boyfriend does all day. Keep reading to find out.

Would I be the AH for asking my boyfriend to make more money

Alright for some background I (21F) have been dating my boyfriend (22M) for 3 years.

We have lived in our current home for about a year.

When we originally moved in our agreement was to split bills 60/40 (I pay 60) and I would do the housework and cooking (I really love cooking and honestly his cleaning is not always thorough so this worked better).

Our rent and utilities total $2300 and our total bills were about $3800. This includes room for personal fun, date nights, savings etc.

Here’s a breakdown on their income.

When we first moved in he was bringing home about $1500 biweekly.

We both deposited our checks into a joint account and everything was going well.

However about 3 months ago his shifts got cut significantly and he is now working about 10 hours a week as a server and bringing home $350 biweekly.

I work as a welding and fabrication specialist and bring in about $1900 biweekly. So my paychecks cover our expenses almost exactly.

She decided to cover the bills herself.

When his shifts first got cut I told him it was no problem and I was happy to cover his expenses while he figured this out.

I did not ask for any part of his $350 because it’s a very small amount and I honestly felt like a jerk asking for that when I was bringing in 5 times that amount.

He stopped depositing his paycheck to our joint account and switched it to his personal one.

Again, no problem it’s only $350.

She isn’t going to make as much money as she used to.

However recently my boss told me that he was switching all welders to a 40 hour week instead of 50 which will decrease my pay.

I am worried about asking my boyfriend to look for a different job because I don’t want to come across as a gold digger.

He has never implied that I am but I have asked for money for electricity once over the past three months and it seemed to ruin his whole day and he seemed very irritated giving it to me and reminded me that that was a third of his paycheck I was asking for.

I never want to come across as greedy or like I only want my partner for their money and asking for money without it being offered makes me feel that way.

She isn’t sure what to do.

I also know he enjoys his job and the hours he works allow him more time for gaming.

He currently spends about 60 hours a week gaming and has been loving it.

It is eventually my goal to be able to support him completely as well as hire a housekeeper to take some of the load off of myself but that is not in the cards until I get a promotion.

So would I be a jerk for asking him to make more? Or would it sound greedy? I never want to be that kind of woman and I do not want to be be viewed that way. Any advice would be appreciated!

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How on earth would she think it would come across as greedy to ask her partner to contribute to the bills? He lives there too! I think she needs to explain that she’s not going to bring home enough to pay the bills herself, so she needs x amount from him in order to cover it. Maybe he can pick up more shifts in order to help out or find a second job.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a teen girl who went above and beyond for a friend, only to be berated about not spending enough money on a gift.

Let’s see what Reddit suggests.

She really is doing everything while he does nothing.

This person suggests giving him an ultimatum.

She really needs to talk to him about this.

She is definitely not a gold digger.

Her boyfriend is the gold digger. He’s in a sweet situation where she pays all the bills and cooks and cleans. All he does is go to a part time job he enjoys and then play video games all day. Unless the video game thing is some sort of career, which it sounds like it’s not since he’s not making any money from it, he needs to pull the plug and go get another job.

I don’t understand why she would want to cook, clean and be the sole breadwinner while her boyfriend lounges around the house all day. It is definitely not asking too much to ask him to contribute. She should tell him she needs them to go back to the original 60/40 arrangement. He’ll have to figure out where he’s getting the money.