It’s funny how some things are culturally acceptable in some areas, but seen as rude in others.

So, what would you do if a coworker kept irritating customers with nonstop small talk and pet names, then came to you asking why people seemed frustrated with her? Would you avoid the conversation for the sake of her feelings? Or would you tell her the truth, no matter how much it might hurt?

In the following story, one server finds herself in this very predicament and opts for honesty. Here’s what happened.

AITA for telling my coworker why customers might not like her

I work at a restaurant as a server. One of my coworkers moved up here from Georgia for college and started working here a few months ago.

She constantly lays on the “southern charm” thing thick. She calls everyone “honey” and “sweetie” and all of that. She also tends to chit-chat with people instead of just letting them eat after bringing them their food or drinks.

It’s also kind of obvious that a lot of them don’t want to really talk to her. They give one-word answers, and she just barrels forward and talks at them. (Management has told her off more than once for this)

The girl asked her for advice.

About two weeks ago, she was upset because a customer yelled at her and said, “Don’t call me that!” when she called her “honey.”

And she complained that she’s not getting as many tips as the other servers.

She says it’s because she has a southern accent and customers think she’s stupid, but I don’t think that’s the case.

She asked me for advice, and I said it’s because she takes so long to bring things out and wastes time trying to make small talk. I also said that the excessive pet names sound kind of condescending, and they aren’t really something you would call a stranger here.

She tried to explain how things work.

She told me that she wasn’t going to start being rude to customers because she would make even less money.

I told her it’s not being rude, it’s just how things work here, and it’s rude to other customers she’s supposed to be serving when she spends all her time trying to make small talk instead of doing her job and calling them weird things.

Now she’s mad and has been avoiding me. Maybe I could have been gentler when trying to explain why people complain about her, but I was also really stressed because it’s Christmas season and so much is going on.

AITA?

Yikes! It’s easy to see her POV, but there may have been better ways to say it.

Let’s see what the readers over at Reddit think.

This person agrees that small talk is not needed.

Here’s someone who had to get used to that behavior.

According to this comment, the tips could get worse.

For this reader, it’s just a bit of culture clash.

She needs to calm down and lay off the names to try to fit in more.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a man who got his coworker fired when he stopped giving him rides.