Birthday parties should never be complicated and costly for the guests.

The following story involves a man who was invited to a friend’s 35th birthday getaway in the countryside with a small group of acquaintances.

The birthday celebrator created a group chat, and his girlfriend announced that each guest would contribute to the costs.

He suddenly questioned whether this kind of arrangement was normal for a birthday celebration.

What do you think? Read the full story below for all the details.

AITA for not wanting to go to this party?

A friend of mine just turned 35.

He created a Messenger group and invited his close ones. There are 8 people in total, including his girlfriend.

He announced that he had decided to celebrate his birthday in the countryside by renting an Airbnb on a specific date.

Just to be clear, we are not a tight-knit group of friends. Most of us do not really know each other in that chat.

This man learned that he and the other guests would equally shoulder all the costs.

His girlfriend then jumped in by sending the link to the house.

She explained that the place costs around €1000. She said each guest needs to pay their share by transferring a certain amount to her, rounded up to the next euro.

She then immediately sent her IBAN. She also added that for food and alcohol, we would split the bill on the spot.

We were even told not to use Lydia because it takes commissions.

He finds it a bit bold for a birthday celebration.

This honestly made the whole thing feel even more calculated.

I have already been chased up because I had not made the transfer yet. The explanation was that Airbnb would soon charge them directly.

Am I the only one who finds this a bit bold for a birthday celebration?

He thinks the host should shoulder most of the costs.

It is the first time I have been invited to a birthday where guests are asked to cover everything equally.

I never show up empty-handed, and I do not mind contributing financially. But here, I do not know.

If you decide to organize a weekend, you would usually take on at least part of the costs.

In this case, I would end up paying for transport, plus gift, plus accommodation, plus food, plus alcohol.

I should also mention they both have decent salaries.

He is also organizing his girlfriend’s birthday, and it’s nothing like this.

For context, I am currently organizing my girlfriend’s 30th birthday, and we are covering everything ourselves.

We do not expect anything from the guests because it is our choice to throw a nice celebration.

It is not even a question of means. It is more symbolic.

It just feels like the right way to host people you invite.

Now, he’s wondering if he is the problem.

This is why I find it’s hard to understand this situation.

Especially since I only agreed to this birthday after a simple oral invite saying I should be available on that date.

He wanted to celebrate his birthday.

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I will still go. But honestly, I do not even know who I will end up sharing a room with since there are not even enough bedrooms for everyone.

At this point I am wondering if I am the problem or what is going on.

Looks like it’s not gonna be a fun party after all. Lol.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman whose family says they support her art career, but they still don’t want to pay her for product.

Let’s check out the comments of other people on Reddit to this story.

This person gives their honest opinion.

This user offers some advice.

Here’s a good response to the friend.

People are saying the same thing.

Finally, short and straightforward.

Nothing says “happy birthday” like receiving an invoice before the cake.

A birthday party and a birthday weekend celebration are two different things. Even though he previously agreed to a birthday celebration, it’s perfectly reasonable to bow out of a weekend getaway.