Neighbor disputes can start over small things, but once they begin escalating, they often take on a life of their own.

A woman renting a house in Texas says that what began as occasional complaints about cigarette smoke now involves social media posts, video recordings, and even legal threats. Since she and her husband only smoke outside and have made efforts to be considerate, they don’t understand why she’s acting so hostile.

The situation allegedly escalated when the neighbor recorded her over the fence, criticized her in front of her children, and later posted the recording online.

Read the full story below.

AITA for continuing to smoke outside even though my neighbor hired an attorney over it?

I live in Haslet, Texas, in a single-family neighborhood (quarter-acre lots, fenced yards). My husband and I rent the home.

This started because we occasionally smoke cigarettes outside on our back patio, usually with coffee in the morning or here and there during the day.

We don’t smoke inside the house or in the garage whatsoever.

Things quickly escalated.

Our neighbor has been escalating things over the past few months. It started with complaints, but recently she:

Stood on something to look over our fence and recorded me while criticizing me in front of my kids for the example I’m setting, which felt unnecessary and personal.

Posted about us in the neighborhood Facebook group, admitting she recorded me while also identifying which house is ours.

Screamed over the fence saying she hired an attorney and claimed multiple neighbors are complaining, yet most (if not all) of the neighbors who commented sided with us and agreed we have the right to do what we want in the privacy of our own home.

They tried being civilized.

We tried to be considerate and even adjusted where we sit outside.

At one point we tried going into the garage with an air filter to avoid bothering anyone, but she still complained, so we stopped doing that and moved the air filter outside.

Now an attorney has sent a formal letter to our landlord claiming we’re creating a “nuisance” and affecting her health, and threatening further action.

It’s not like they’re going crazy with it.

For context:

We’re in a detached home (not shared walls)

There’s no HOA rule specifically banning smoking

We’re not chain-smoking outside all day

We’ve made efforts to be mindful

I completely understand not liking cigarette smoke, but this has escalated to being recorded, publicly posted about, and now legal threats.

At this point, I feel like I’m the one being harassed, not the other way around.

We’re taking a step back from engaging directly and letting everything be handled appropriately moving forward.

AITA?

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about someone who asked their neighbor to move their fence off their property, then learned the neighbor was trying to claim their land as theirs instead.

What did Reddit think?

A reader shares their thoughts.

Something to consider.

If life throws you lemons, make a barbecue!

Another reader chimes in.

Yup.

Conflicts between neighbors are rarely simple because both sides may feel their quality of life is being affected, and maybe it really is. People live differently, and sharing a space is often hard.

On one hand, most people would agree that cigarette smoke is hard to ignore. It’s very understandable why someone might feel concerned about the impact on their health.

On the other hand, the renter argues that she and her husband are using their own outdoor space, not violating any community rules, and have already made accommodations. Then when her neighbor started acting like she did, it got ever harder to find a peaceful solution.

In a way, both are right and wrong at the same time, which only makes things more complicated to solve.

I must say, though, I think this might be the perfect time for them to quit!

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a tenant who decided to stop returning his neighbor’s misplaced laundry after two years.