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Father’s Day is one of those holidays that comes with pretty clear rules. Your kids celebrate you, maybe your partner helps coordinate if those kids are small, and everyone eats overpriced brunch.

But when you’re dating someone whose only child is a full-grown adult, the expectations get blurry fast.

In the following story, a woman’s boyfriend of just over a year told her she should’ve gotten him a Father’s Day gift simply because he’s a dad.

She’s never been in a parenting role with his 21-year-old son, has no relationship with the kid’s mother, and is estranged from her own parents.

She was still deciding whether she even wanted to attend brunch, and suddenly she’s being told she dropped the ball on a holiday she has zero personal connection to.

You’ll want top keep reading for this one.

AITAH for not buying my boyfriend a father’s day gift?

Okay, I am 38F and my boyfriend is 48M and we have been together just over a year.

He has a 21M son, which is cool, whatevs.

She never really signed up for parenting.

I’ve never been in any idea of being a stepmom. He has a mom (as wonk as she is) and he is an adult.

I might try to help him communicate better or notice red flags, but all adult situation stuff.

So as Father’s Day rolled around, it put her in a unique position.

Today I was trying to figure out if I wanted to wake up at 9 AM to go to brunch with him and his parents for Father’s Day.

I am NC with my parents and feel like this holiday is super optional for me.

Then came the topic of gift giving.

He started to say that I should have gotten him a gift.

I tried to ask why and he just said, “Well, cause I’m a dad.”

Which is great! But what did I have to do with it?

She thinks the responsibility lies solely elsewhere.

I think it would be absolutely fabulous if his ex-wife (21M’s mother) got him a gift. Honestly, she should, but do I really have some obligation to this just cause we are dating?

AITAH here? Am I missing something?

Her boyfriend really needs to reassess his expectations.

What did Reddit have to say?

Maybe he should be asking his son for a gift instead of her.

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This user agrees her boyfriend’s son should really step up.

Getting your partner a gift for Father’s Day isn’t really a thing.

This user echoes the same sentiment.

This story feels like one of those situations where everyone has an expectation they’ve never communicated and then gets upset when it isn’t met.

If Father’s Day gifts from a girlfriend were that important to him, that conversation needed to happen before the holiday, not as a guilt trip after.

It’s also worth mentioning she’s been in his life for a year. She didn’t raise his kid, didn’t contribute to his fatherhood journey, and has her own very valid reasons for not connecting with this particular holiday.

Entitlement isn’t a good look for her boyfriend.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a man whose friends say he’s privileged for wanting to eat at nicer restaurants.

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Author

Benjamin Cottrell

Benjamin Cottrell | Assistant Editor, Internet Culture

Benjamin Cottrell is an Assistant Editor and contributing writer at TwistedSifter, specializing in internet culture, viral social dynamics, and the moral complexities of online communities. He brings a highly analytical, editorial voice to his reporting on workplace conflicts, malicious compliance, and interpersonal drama, with a specific focus on nuanced stories that lack an obvious villain.

As a published author of rhetorical criticism, Benjamin leverages his academic background in human communication to dissect and elevate viral social media threads. Instead of simply summarizing events, he provides readers with balanced, deep-dive commentary into why the internet reacts the way it does. In addition to his cultural reporting, he is an experienced fine art photography essayist and video game reviewer.

When he isn’t analyzing the latest viral debates, Benjamin is usually chipping away at his extensive video game backlog, hunting down the best new restaurants, or out exploring the city with a camera in hand.

Connect with Benjamin on Instagram and read more of his essays on Substack.