Her Parents Let Her Move In During A Rough Time, Then Decided Her Sister Needed The Space More. Were They Wrong?
by Trisha Leigh
There is probably a favorite child in most families – or at least, the perception of one.
Issues arise, however, when the parents pretty much admit to that fact, leaving the non-favorite siblings out in the cold.
OP recently lost her husband and her job, and so she moved home to have more of a support system. Her parents offered to let her live in a property they own, though it needed some TLC, for “as long as she needed.”
This spring, my boyfriend and rock in my life passed away. At the same time, I lost my job. I had a lot going on, and moved back to my home town.
My parents own a rural property they used to rent out. The property had been empty for a while and fairly run down.
My parents invited me to stay there (rent free), told me it was my home for as long as I needed.
It was going great, with OP finding a job, making a few friends, and fixing the place up.
I invested a lot of my time and money (found a remote gig) into getting the house fixed up.
I also made friends with Olha, a Ukrainian refugee with a young daughter. Olha was struggling and I invited her to stay with me for a couple of months while she gets back on her feet (I could use company as well).
She was very thankful but hasn’t made a firm response yet as she’s trying to make things work independently. My parents had no issue with this.
That is, until her sister, brother-in-law, and their daughter also ended up needing a place to live.
Until recent drama. My brother in law had been working for a shady company, which skirted regulations for profit. The law had caught up with the owner, who folded the company and left the country.
I’ll cut this short given the post character limit, a few other things went down and my sister’s family abruptly moved to our hometown, moving in with my parents.
My (34f) sister (31f) was the first among four siblings to have a kid (5f). My niece is incredibly spoiled by my sister, our parents and extended family, and my parents bend over backwards for my sister’s requests (like canceling their anniversary trip because my sister asked to babysit while she goes on a girls’ weekend).
Her family thinks it makes more sense to give the family the bigger space, but OP is upset at the idea that they need it more for a variety of reasons.
Almost immediately my parents and sister approached me to swap (I move in with our parents and sis and her family take my place). They said the house I lived in was too large for one person, and it’d be so much better for my niece to live on a beautiful property in nature
I didn’t understand. My parents have two guest rooms, my sister/BIL and the kid have their own bedrooms (I sure didn’t at 5). My BIL is still loaded from his old job and could easily get them a place, too (they are buying a flashy car).
When I mentioned my work on the property, it was dismissed. When I reminded them about Olha, my parents were outraged I was still intent on helping someone else and their child and not my own sister and niece. They kept making out my sister’s situation to be nearly as bad as Olha’s.
Eventually it came down to my parents saying “you’re living on our property, you’ll do as we want.” I said, well you gave it to me and said this was my house as well, to be my home for as long as I needed. But if we want to talk in property terms and not family terms, evict me then.
My parents are not evicting, but I receive daily calls and messages from them and extended family guilt tripping me and calling me an AH for not giving up the more comfortable space to my sister, who is in such a difficult situation!and has a little child! Only my brothers see my side, but since they are young men in college their opinion means nothing to my family.
I feel like I am taking crazy pills. AITA?
Is Reddit going to be on her side? Or will they take up for the golden sister too?
Let’s find out!
The top comment says OP doesn’t own the property, but her parents should compensate her for the work.
This person thinks OP should spend her energy elsewhere.
But this commenter thinks people are being too harsh.
They say everyone is forgetting that OP is struggling, too.
Because after all, she’s there because she’s a young widow.
This whole situation is rough, if you ask me.
I hope their family can find a good way to navigate it.
Sign up to get our BEST stories of the week straight to your inbox.