What’s the deal with roommates thinking they own the kitchen?

This guy and his girlfriend share an apartment with a roommate who thinks every meal is a communal event.

Let’s just say, things got heated when they had to remind her the meal was for somebody else!

Read on for the story.

AITA for telling my roommate I don’t cook food she likes because I don’t cook for her?

I (21M) and my girlfriend (E, 20F) live together with a roommate (A, 31F).

We all contribute equally to our monthly “house food” (food meant for everyone, not one specific person) budget.

We can still have our own food, and as long as we communicate so nobody eats someone else’s food.

A couple weeks ago, I made myself and E some spaghetti with the house food. Just noodles and generic brand canned sauce, nothing fancy.

Quick and easy because I was feeling lazy.

Delish.

A was at work until late that night, and myself and my gf ended up finishing all the spaghetti.

When A came home, she saw the dirty pot in the sink and made a comment about being sad there was none saved for her.

I asked if she wanted me save some for her next time I made it, but she didn’t really give me a straight answer.

I got the feeling she wanted me to though, so I made a mental note to do that next time I made spaghetti and moved on.

A few days later, I made some pork chops. Again, nothing fancy.

E wasn’t hungry and didn’t eat her portion, so I offered it to A when she came home.

She accepted, however when she put the food in the microwave to warm it she made a face as the smell hit her.

Um, rude.

She tried not to let me see, but I could tell she wasn’t thrilled. She took the food into her room to eat, which isn’t unusual for her, so I don’t know if she finished it or what.

Since then, whenever we’re in the kitchen together and I’m cooking, she’s been kind of hovering over my shoulder and trying to give me advice on how to season my food.

Honestly, sometimes it’s good advice. I’m one of those people who views cooking as a constant learning thing, so I don’t mind taking suggestions.

However, she gave me an attitude whenever I didn’t do something how she wanted or liked.

It was always subtle and unspoken, until yesterday.

Uncalled for.

I was making spaghetti again.

When I make spaghetti, I keep the noodles and sauce separate, so everyone can choose how much sauce they want.

A’s seen me make spaghetti before, but this time she said I made it “the white people way.”

I feel it is important to note that she is also white.

She said I should mix the sauce in, and I told her that wasn’t how I make it. She told me that she liked it better when it was pre-mixed, and here’s where I maybe went too far…

Here it comes.

I told her I don’t care how she likes it, because I wasn’t cooking it for her.

I told her that when I cook, mine and my gf’s preferences are the only things I consider, because the food is being made for us, not for her.

If she doesn’t like it, she has her own food to make, and there is nothing stopping her from eating that.

She got all huffy and stormed off, and later on E said my tone came off a bit angry. I wasn’t angry, I was just stating a fact, but maybe there was a way to put it more gently?

I don’t know.

I’m told that I can sometimes come off as an a****le without meaning to, that I have one of those resting faces that makes me look angry all the time even when I’m not.

So AITA?

From unsolicited advice to outright meal critiques, it’s clear that living with a roommate who doesn’t know her boundaries can be tough.

Redditors had a lot to say on this one!

This person suggests everyone buys their own food.

This person agrees the system clearly isn’t working.

This commenter is also on the same page.

Sometimes, the secret ingredient is setting boundaries.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.