Announcing a pregnancy at work usually invites congratulations and casual questions from coworkers.

Unfortunately, one young man’s casual question inadvertently dampened the pregnant co-worker’s celebratory mood in an unexpected way.

Read on for the full story.

AITA for asking my pregnant colleague if she is having a boy or a girl?

Today at our weekly team meeting, one of my colleagues announced that she is pregnant and will be going on maternity leave in April.

Everyone reacted with congratulations and excitement for her, and I did too. We all told her we’re very happy for her and her family and wish her all the best.

So he thought he could ask another follow-up question.

A few minutes later, I was in the elevator with her and 3 of our other team members (so 5 of us out of a total team of 11 people) on our way back to our desks.

Just for the sake of conversation, I asked her if she is having a boy or a girl.

Boy was he wrong.

Her face kind off fell and she grimly and shortly said “boy”.

I thought it was strange that she reacted like this, but let it go.

Then after I was back at my desk, she came up to me and said that my question was inappropriate, that she was planning on announce the gender herself but I “forced” her to say it like that in an elevator, so now half of our team knows and it “killed the magic”.

Now he’s even more confused and questioning his command of workplace etiquette.

I was honestly really confused and apologised profusely.

She lectured me on how I shouldn’t be asking personal questions and walked away.

I honestly couldn’t have thought this was in any way a personal question. Is it too personal?

I’m a 24 year old dude and I don’t know anything about pregnant women or babies or social customs, I guess. I was just trying to be friendly.

AITA?

Missteps at work are bound to happen, and it’s clear he meant no malice with his question.

What did Reddit think?

This user thinks she’s taking herself a bit too seriously.

In this commenter’s eyes, she was the one being tactless.

The onus is on her to express her needs, not on him to anticipate them.

The other options of what she could have said are limitless.

She may be having a baby, but it doesn’t give her license to act like one.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.