Names carry identity, culture, and a basic level of respect.

So when a French employee named Michel joined an American workplace, most coworkers learned to pronounce his name correctly — except one senior colleague who insisted on calling him “Mitch” instead.

It started off as a mere annoyance, but this employee soon contemplated turning this matter of principle into a formal HR complaint.

Keep reading for the full story.

WIBTA for going to HR about a coworker refusing to use my (foreign) name instead of an American one?

I’m French, been working in an American company for a few months as part of my post-grad studies. My name’s Michel, pronounced the same as the American name Michelle.

When I arrived in the US, I was worried to overstep boundaries, and I wasn’t confident in my English skills, so I let people speak over me a lot.

It was an uphill battle at first, but eventually Michel’s American colleagues caught on.

A few coworkers tripped over my name at first, but almost all of them learned the proper pronunciation quickly.

All except John.

John was quite the different story.

John is a senior employee, I guess in his 60s, with a pretty bombastic and loud demeanor, the kind who will slap your back hard and laugh out loud at his own jokes. I’m not a fan of John.

Especially since he decided that my name is “Mitch.”

At first, I let it go because I thought John genuinely struggled to pronounce Michel.

But when John revealed he was perfectly capable of pronouncing it in a different context, Michel grew even more annoyed.

But after a couple months, I heard him mention Michelle Obama.

I couldn’t believe it at first when he just pronounced my name perfectly.

John’s reasoning for repeatedly flubbing Michel’s name was even more frustrating.

I pointed it out excitedly, “This is my name! See, you can say it right!” But he countered with “It’s a woman’s name!”

I said I don’t care, it’s my name, in my culture it’s not female, please pronounce it right. He essentially waved it off with “Sure thing, Mitch, hahaha!”

Eventually, Michel was done putting up with the disrespect.

Since then, as I grew bolder and more confident in this new environment, I have asked him a couple more times to call me Michel, not Mitch. Both times, he deflected my request and kept calling me Mitch.

I sent him a formal mail asking him to please call me by my actual name, but that mail went unanswered.

He knows it might not seem like a big deal for some people, but to him, it is.

It’s not the end of the world that John calls me Mitch, but it grates on my nerves a bit more every time, especially since he’s the only one to refuse to use my actual name — and because he apparently tries to unilaterally “protect” me from being called what he deems a female name(?)

He wonders if going to HR is the next logical step.

I am thinking about complaining to HR and force John to take the issue seriously by going through people whose requests he can’t just ignore to their faces.

At the same time, I am afraid to appear like a petty, belligerent ah if I do over a “mere” mispronunciation of my name.

WIBTA?

John’s behavior is just plain rude.

Redditors chime in with their thoughts.

John most definitely wouldn’t like it if the roles were reversed.

Contrary to what John believes, getting someone’s name right is a big deal.

This sounds a lot like a scenario from a workplace sensitivity training.

What if this employee just decided to stop responding altogether?

This commenter would handle the situation something like this.

He wasn’t asking for anything crazy here — just basic respect.

If you liked that story, check out this post about an oblivious CEO who tells a web developer to “act his wage”… and it results in 30% of the workforce being laid off.