When you live very close to your neighbors, it can get annoying to always have them around.

What would you do if the neighbors on either side of your home would always walk through your yard, have their kids play on your property, and even sit on your porch?

That is what is happening to the woman in this story, and she is tired of it, so she is thinking about putting up a fence. She knows, however, that if she puts up a fence, the neighbors will hate her for it, so she doesn’t know what to do.

In a case like this, she needs to either just build the fence or have the difficult conversation with the neighbors to tell them to stay away. Read through the full story below and see what you think she should do.

To Fence or Not to Fence…

I just need to vent somewhere. I need opinions. This is something that’s been eating away at me and my family for quite awhile now and it’s just getting worse.

This sounds like a lovely home.

So..where to begin.. I’m in a row-home, we own the house. I share steps/walkway with one neighbor, and I share a connected lawn with another neighbor.

On my little front lawn, I have a patio, a little flower garden spot, and a really nice tree in the middle. The tree is most definitely on my own lawn, but the branches do reach over to the other side of the lawn that is my neighbors.

I can see how this would get annoying.

Before these two sets of neighbors moved in, I actually sat outside and enjoyed my lawn a lot. I would sit out on my patio, with a cup of coffee and a book, or with headphones on.

But that all ended for me when they moved in. Both sides like to go out a lot. And I mean.. a lot. The lawn-sharing neighbors are outside almost every day. They sit on their porch (which is connected with mine), they play their phones out loud. They bought a fire pit, and a boombox.

The neighbors don’t seem to understand where the property line is.

Neighbor on the other side, has small children. She comes out and sits on our steps (not her own patio, but on our shared steps, so right in front of my door), and has the small kids running around. Needless to say, I have no interest in sitting outside anymore.

So, why a fence? Well, both neighbors have become close friends. They now walk across my lawn back and forth to talk and visit each other. They walk across my patio.

Why does everyone want to be in her yard?

The children are now playing in my yard along with the dog. Running around my tree. One kid pulled out one of my garden decorations and bent it. The toddler recently was walking through my garden spot and got his foot stuck in the wire and was screaming.

It is so infuriating to see the small children come out and immediately go in to my yard to play. I have never even seen them use their own yard!

If she doesn’t say anything, this will only continue.

I suspect they prefer my yard because the tree and garden is fun and enticing, because their own yard is completely bare, no decorations or toys for the kids, nothing.

So, the children simply bee-line for ours. They are so young, that the children are under the impression it’s their own space because the parents are not keeping them out. The parents are also using our lawn like it’s their own.

They have no reason to think they are doing anything wrong.

Even if my brother is outside smoking, they will walk across our lawn right in front of him. They literally think there is no problem treating it like a public space.

This is difficult because we are apparently on “good terms”. We wave, we say hi. Yada yada. Also, one of the neighbors experienced a tragedy in the family that we know of, and so for a long time we felt like it’s “off-limits” to be mean.

She needs to establish firm boundaries.

But despite being friendly when coming across each other. They aren’t being friendly or respectful with their actions. Playing the boombox late into the night. Their fire pit was placed directly under one of our hanging tree branches.

We raised a concern right away, but he shooed us away saying it was fine. The “nice” lady encourages her kids to treat our lawn like it’s theirs.

She is smart for not wanting to upset the neighbors.

I know it seems like this is just so straightforward, just put up a fence, no big deal, right? But these are people I come face to face with whenever I exit my door.

They are right there. This isn’t the suburbs. I hate the idea of living shoulder-to-shoulder with people on both sides who will despise us. Because they both will be mad at this, cutting them off from use of my lawn, and also cutting off their ease of access to each other.

Why doesn’t she just talk to them about the situation?

I wish there was a less confrontational way of addressing this, but I don’t know how.

In my mind, I don’t know if I should bother putting up a fence and making enemies, or if I should just buckle down, never sit outside, and keep focusing on the possibility of moving (which would be years and years away).

If she isn’t willing to confront them, then nothing will change.

I keep hoping they will move if they are renters, and if they do, I’d move at lightning speed to get a fence up before a different set of people moved in.

I’m just a coward, I know. I’m introverted, quiet and non-confrontational, I’m not built for city or rowhome living.

She needs to either talk to them about her concerns or put up the fence and not worry about their attitude. If she won’t do either of those things, she’ll just have to live with it.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say about the situation.

This person has a great idea.

Putting up a fence is definitely a good option.

She really isn’t on good terms with them. They are just taking advantage of her.

There is no reason to make them think they are the cause of the fence.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman who shuts down her neighbor’s construction project after her property gets damaged.

This person thinks she is overthinking the situation.

Things will never change if she doesn’t confront the issue. It isn’t like she really likes these neighbors anyway, so she shouldn’t worry about that.

Putting up a fence is a good idea, and if it is done right, the neighbors shouldn’t even have a problem with it.