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It’s a sad truth that approximately 40% of marriages end in divorce. So however sure you might be on your wedding day that this will last forever – because why would you be getting married if you didn’t believe that, after all – there is a four in ten chance that you’re wrong, and your marriage will end a lot sooner than you might have thought too. So of course, through our lifetime many of us will either be the person getting a divorce, or we’ll be supporting a loved one who is divorcing. And sometimes, that is no mean feat.

The couple in this story are more than happy to support the husband’s brother, who is going through a divorce and is currently facing a tough time. After all he doesn’t have a stable income, and he’s just moved into an apartment that isn’t really suited to his needs. So they offer to help. But when they do so, they did not realise quite how much offering him a favour was going to cost them.

Read on to find out why.

AITA for telling my brother in law he can’t keep charging his electric car at our house without paying for it?

My brother in law, Dale, moved into an apartment about four months ago shortly after his divorce.

But the apartment complex he lives in does not have any facilities for charging cars, and their facility only has street parking for vehicles.

Because he uses an electric car, he requested permission from us to charge his car in our garage whenever he visited us.

We readily agreed to his request without realising how often it would happen.

Let’s see how this is affecting the family’s bills.

He ended up coming practically every day after finishing work and charging his car for two or three hours before leaving.

Our electricity charges have increased by eighty nine dollars per month because of his frequent visits to charge his car.

I raised this issue to my husband, and we both felt that it had gone too far.

Now we have told him that he either pays us a monthly charge for electricity or looks for another facility to charge his car.

Let’s see how Dale reacted to this.

But Dale was angry about it and told us that one family member should help the other, especially considering that after a divorce, he is still rebuilding his life.

He said that charging stations around were costly and not easy to use, rather than using our garage. My husband feels guilty and told me that maybe we should give Dale some more time considering what he has been through.

I disagreed and told him that it is not just a small favor that Dale keeps doing and it is costing us money every month, so it cannot be absorbed quietly by us every month.

Dale does have a regular source of income and can budget for the expenses that come his way as much as others do.

There is always awkwardness at the family events now, and my mother in law says that I am being heartless considering his divorce. So am I wrong making my husband’s brother pay for the electricity he uses in our house?

AITA?

Sure, you can feel sorry for Dale to some extent.

But there’s a difference between charging his car at their house when he visits, and visiting their house specifically to charge his car.

And the sheer amount it’s costing them in electricity is ridiculous.

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Let’s see what folk on Reddit had to say about this.

This person thought Dale was taking them for granted.

While others pointed out how hypocritical he was being.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who feels hoodwinked after finding out the sick father she’s been supporting has plenty of money of his own.

Meanwhile, others thought it should be other family members’ problem.

Genuinely, Dale said it himself. Charging an electric car can be expensive. So why he’s acting like his brother and sister in law should be absorbing those costs is crazy. Sure, he has his own little pity party going because of his divorce. And anyone who has been through divorce will tell you what a hard time it can be, owing to not only the end of a relationship you thought was going to last a lifetime and the loss of a constant companion, but the extra expenses of living alone. And if Dale doesn’t have a stable source of income, then this is going to be even worse.

But there’s a difference between leaning on family, and taking advantage of them. Now that Dale is visiting every day and lumbering them with his charging costs, you have to wonder what is next. Expecting them to feed him dinner every night while he waits for his car to charge? Taking a shower there every night too, and using their water? Finally just moving into their spare room? It’s absurd, but then, Dale’s behaviour is absurd too. Where is this going to stop?

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Author

Kyra Piperides

Kyra Piperides, PhD | Contributing Science Writer

Dr. Kyra Piperides is a contributing writer for TwistedSifter, specializing in Science & Discovery. Holding a PhD in English with a dedicated focus on the intersections of science, politics, and literature, she brings over 12 years of professional writing and editorial expertise to her reporting.

Kyra possesses a highly authoritative background in academic publishing, having served as the editor of an academic journal for three years. She is also the published author of two books and numerous research-driven articles. At TwistedSifter, she leverages her rigorous academic background to translate complex scientific concepts, global tech innovations, and environmental breakthroughs into highly engaging, accessible narratives for a mainstream audience.

Based in the UK, Kyra is an avid backpacker who spends her free time immersing herself in different cultures across distant shores—a passion that brings a rich, global perspective to her writing about Earth and nature.

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