She Pays Rent And Cooks Her Own Meals, But Her Mom Calls Her Selfish For Refusing To Wash Everyone’s Dishes
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You should never have to clean up after grown adults just because they’ve decided they won’t do it themselves.
In the following story, we’ll meet a woman who’s tired of coming home from work to a kitchen full of everyone else’s dirty dishes.
Although she’s staying with her parents to save money, she pays rent and handles her own meals and chores. Still, she regularly ends up washing their dishes before she can even start dinner.
So, one evening, she’d had enough and pushed their mess aside before cooking and cleaning up after herself.
Unfortunately, her mom took that as selfishness and got upset rather than making her husband and son help themselves.
Read on to see exactly what happened.
AITA for refusing to wash dishes that I didn’t dirty?
I’m a 25F living with my parents while my boyfriend (26M) and I save up for our own place after graduating.
I pay rent to my parents, work full-time, putting in about 16 hours more per week than my mom, buy my own groceries, and cook all my own meals due to health-related dietary restrictions.
Since my parents’ religious beliefs forbid my boyfriend from sleeping over at our house, I spend every weekend at his place instead. Every time I get back on Sunday, my mom gives me disapproving looks and guilt-trips me for “never helping around the house.”
Most days, there’s a dirty kitchen waiting for her to get home.
Here’s the main issue: the kitchen.
Almost every single day, I come home from a long workday to find the counters and sink piled high with dirty dishes left by my parents and 19-year-old brother.
Before I can even start cooking my own dinner, I am forced to wash their dishes just to clear enough space to prepare my meal. Afterward, I cook and clean up after myself. I even cook for my brother sometimes when he asks.
Fed up, she only took care of her own stuff.
We don’t have a dishwasher because my dad insists we “don’t need one,” even though he rarely, if ever, washes a dish himself.
A few days ago, I reached my limit. I came home to a trashed kitchen, so I pushed their dirty dishes aside, cooked my meal, washed only what I used, and left the rest.
My mom immediately confronted me, complaining that I’m unhelpful, selfish, and that I “abandon” her every weekend to deal with everything alone.
Now, her mother is angry with her.
I held my ground. I told her I’m done cleaning up after three capable adults when I didn’t eat their food. I reminded her that I work full-time, pay rent, buy my own food, and handle my own chores. I pointed out that my dad and brother are fully grown men who can wash their own plates.
Her defense? “They simply don’t do it.”
I told her that wasn’t my problem and that it was high time they learned. She got furious, called me selfish, and stormed off.
AITA?
Wow! She does more for that household than most adult children do.
Let’s take a look at what the readers over at Reddit had to say about this situation.
This is what it sounds like.
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According to this comment, the parents created the mess.
For this person, it’s time for her to move.
Here’s someone who thinks the parents are expecting too much.
Her mom is getting mad at the wrong person.
If she’s tired of doing everything alone, she needs to address that with her husband and son.
In the meantime, her daughter should keep saving and make a plan to move out as soon as she can.
There’s no reason to keep arguing about dishes when her mom has already decided the men don’t have to help.
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