We’ve said time and again that blending families is hard work, and there are often a lot of setbacks along the way.

And that’s when everyone is genuinely trying.

OP remarried after his wife died. He, his new wife, and his 15yo son get along well for the most part.

I (M36) remarried after my late wife passed away. I have a son (15). My current wife and I have been together for 2 years.

She generally has a good relationship with my son although they tend to have some disagreements from time to time.

His son is into woodworking, a skill he learned from his grandfather. While they were planning to take the stepmom out for a nice birthday meal with friends, he crafted her a gift.

My son has background in arts that involve wood. He used to help his grandfather with his woodworking and learned how to make hand made wooden items and use them as gifts.

I planned a dinner party for my wife’s birthday at a prestigious restaurant.

She ‘found’ it in his room and asked him about it – it was a sweet gift that honored their blended family. She thanked him but asked him not to give it to her at the restaurant.

The day before the party, she was cleaning my son’s room and saw what he got her for her birthday and that was a wooden tree with mine, hers, and his name on it.

She talked with him and told him while she thought it was a sweet gift, she asked that he don’t bring it to the restaurant and give it to her there.

Why? No idea.

When OP asked her about it she said she thought it looked “ridiculous” and didn’t want to have it at her fancy dinner.

When my son told me this I just had to call her out on it.

She flatout said that she thought the gift looked ridiculous and she didn’t want it to be seen in that prestigious restaurant, and in front of her guests.

I lost it on her and told her she should be ashamed of herself for saying this when my son was being sincere and thoughtful.

She swore she wasn’t “ashamed” nor “embarrassed” by his work and even said she’ll take the gift but she “simply” didn’t want it to be seen there.

He said no worries because there would be no dinner.

I told her not to worry about it since I decided to cancel the whole thing.

She went off on me calling me unreasonable for outright cancelling her birthday over such trivial thing.

I refused to keep arguing but she threw a fit about how I ruined her birthday and made her lose respect for me and my promises.

She yelled at him and went to stay at her mother’s, and she’s yelling at him now, too.

My son kept the gift since she left the house 2 days ago, and her mom has been chewing me out for my decision and calling me a jerk for treating her daughter like this.

It could be that it was not a big deal and I overreacted, but my son was feeling hurt by her request.

OP isn’t ready to give in, but should he?

The top comment says no, she’s completely in the wrong here.

And this person agrees the stepson’s gift was extremely sweet and thoughtful.

They say that for most people, the meaning behind the gift is everything.

This person is proud of OP for standing up for his son.

They honestly don’t see how their relationship can continue forward.

I feel so sad for this kid.

He’s lost his mom and now this.