Every parent wants to be their for their child’s big “firsts”.

From first words (Hopefully Mama or Dada!) to first steps, getting to see your children reach those big milestones is a richly rewarding experience.

On the flip side, missing those big moments can be devastating to a first time parent!

All that being said, parental F.O.M.O posed a problem for this Grandma, who went to Reddit to vent her frustration for her daughter-in-laws restricting rules for babysitting!

Check it out

AITA for telling my DIL she needs to relax her rules if she wants me to keep babysitting

I’m looking for a second opinion. I have always been close with my son and daughter in law and think we have a really good relationship.

They live just a mile down the road so we are together quite a bit.

Babysitting has started to cause some friction though and I want to make sure that I’m being reasonable.

My son and daughter-in-law have a 3 year old little boy that is as sweet as can be. My son works Monday-Friday and my daughter-in-law is a stay at home mom.

I babysit my grandson 2 days during the week so my DIL can have a break and typically one evening/night on weekends for them to have a date night.

But OP’s daughter-in-law had some rules that made babysitting quite the challenge….

My DIL has this rule that she wants to be there for any “firsts” that my grandson does. I get that; though her definition of “first” is very broad.

Not just like first trip to the zoo, but first time at a new park, first time seeing a new TV show, first time playing with a toy etc.

I personally think the restrictions are a tad over the top, but her kid her rules and I have no problem respecting that.

OP said these rules wouldn’t be a problem, if her daughter in law actually did any of those firsts while she was with her kid!

The issue happens in that she doesn’t do any of these firsts.

I’m really not sure what they do all day when they are home but everything I ask to take my grandson to do she says is a first, that she wants to be there for, but then she doesn’t do it.

It’s made it so babysitting is a lot of just sitting at my house with nothing to do and my grandson is bored.

So with the energy of a restless three year old on her hands, OP put her foot down!

So the other day I told her that I think it would be a good idea for her to relax the first rule a bit so that I can take my grandson to do some things while I am babysitting.

She did not like that and said that I was trying to take memories and special moments away from her.

I’m not trying to overstep but a bored three year old with no way to burn off energy is a lot to handle andI told her I don’t know if I could babysit as frequently with the rules how they are.

She accused me of blackmailing her.

Do you think OP’s daughter in law would want to be there for her first time watching paint dry? Cause it sounds like that’s about all there is to do at Grandma’s!

Reddit came down hard on Team Grandma for this one, with many saying it was easier to ask for forgiveness than permission!

Others suggested they do these milestones together to get them out of the way without excluding OP’s daughter-in-law.

This user thought OP should give a deadline for her daughter-in-law to get these firsts out of the way.

Some said playing coy might make the situation even worse.

And finally, this user thought she should give up her babysitting duties altogether!

Hopefully OP’s daughter-in-law will be there for her son’s first time out of the house!

Pray for that poor kid everyone, and good luck to Grandma!

If you liked that story, check out this post about a group of employees who got together and why working from home was a good financial decision.