When one of your best and longest running friendships encounters a new party – usually a romantic partner – the path can get oddly uncomfortable for awhile.

Most of us will just grin and bear it so we can hang onto important friendships.

OP has a “free-spirited” friend who she loves like a sister.

I (34 F) have a friend named Summer (also 34 F) who’s a free spirit.

In high school, she got sent home multiple times for going to class barefoot. She dropped out of college and hitchhiked to Mexico one summer, didn’t tell anyone where she was going.

She forgets to pay her phone bill, so she’s occasionally unreachable. I know that sounds like a lot–and it’ll sound like even more by the end of this–but we’ve been friends since we were 10.

I don’t care that she’s a mess. I love her. We’re in this for the long haul.

Now she has a boyfriend, who apparently got the idea that OP was lying to him about his girlfriend’s whereabouts.

Summer’s boyfriend, Will, is the opposite of her, and I’d hoped he’d mellow out her wild side. You know how Summer forgets to pay her phone bill? Well, apparently she did it again.

I found out when Will called me Friday morning while I was at work. He said he was having trouble locating Summer.

I said, “Yup, that’s Summer for ya. If you get a hold of her, please tell her to call me. Best of luck!”

Then I hung up, thinking nothing of it.

Will rang me again and demanded to know where Summer is. I truthfully said that I have no idea, but I’ll call her parents for him and see if they know.

I went to do exactly that, but Will called me AGAIN before I could. I answered, and it was the same question but angrier: “Where the f— is my girlfriend?”

OP got sick of him and told him to sod off.

I’ll spare you the suspense–this went on for quite some time. Absolutely no clue why Will was convinced I know where Summer is, but I told him exactly when/where I last saw her and that she disappears like this routinely–which he damn well knows; they’ve been together for a YEAR.

I used the plainest language possible, but Will just wouldn’t relent.

He called me about 50 times. I put it on silent at first, but by the 51st time, I’d had enough.

I answered and said, “Bro, STOP blowing up my phone! I don’t know where Summer is, and I’ll block you if I have to. You’re going to get me fired.”

Then I turned my phone off.

Now her friend is insisting OP apologize, but she’s refusing.

Today, Summer called me.

I was expecting some form of explanation, but she opened with, “I’m handing the phone to Will. He wants an apology.”

I stopped her and said “Apology for what?”

She said, “For saying that he blew up your phone.”

To which I replied, “He DID blow up my phone, and I was at work too. Maybe I shouldn’t have threatened to block, but he didn’t get the point the first fifty times I said it calmly.”

Summer said just apologize because he’s really angry, and here’s where I’m probably TA: No. No to all o’  that.

I’m not apologizing because her milquetoast boyfriend–who is basically the human equivalent of a dry ham sandwich–is on some ego trip. I said that but nicer, and she hung up on me.

Now I’m thinking I should’ve sucked it up rather than jeopardize two decades of friendship.

AITA?

The top comment says the boyfriend is the one who needs to apologize.

They suspect something else is going on behind the scenes.

This person is worried about OP’s friend.

And this commenter hopes OP won’t give up on her friend.

Too many people know exactly what’s happening here.

I mean, she did nothing wrong.

That said, she might need to just suck it up if she wants to keep her friend.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.