Most people really don’t like to be surprised – it’s human nature, I think, to want to be prepared and ready with a response or answer.

Sometimes we can’t, though, and we don’t always react in the best possible way when we’re caught off guard.

OP has been looking after her young niece while her mother is in prison.

My niece (14) has lived with me since her parents went to prison 5 years ago. My sister is getting out later this year. She has been working very hard in prison to improve herself and got her GED.

We are still very close and we talk via an app the prison provides and I take her daughter to visit her, along with her brother, who lives with his dad’s brother, once a month.

She was shocked when her niece presented her with adoption papers in front of family.

We were having a birthday dinner at my mother’s for myself and my daughter, 16 . Most of my family was there.

For my present my niece decided to give me adoption request papers or whatever they are. I never ended up reading them.

I was stunned and just… Shook my head. I was so shocked and confused.

The plan was she was always supposed to go home. My mother was upset by this request as well as my other siblings, and my husband couldn’t think of what to do either. She never brought this up in counseling or anything.

I can’t do that to my sister, I would not be able to to take care of her without support financially from my grandma, who would stop supporting if I agreed. This was never even a thought.

Now, the situation and feelings of all involved are really big and complex.

Now she and my daughter hate me, it seems. My son, 21 , said it was probably something she got from tiktock and she will eventually get over it.

My husband agrees with me, my siblings are staying out of it.

My nephew isn’t speaking to his sister now.

It’s a mess.

AITA here?

The top comment says what’s done is done.

This person is really sympathizing with the niece, though.

They definitely have a hard row to hoe.

None of this can be easy for a kid.

At the very least, their communication could improve.

I honestly feel for everyone involved.

Let’s hope for the best possible outcome for all.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.