Raising children with an ex certainly comes with a variety of challenges, but as long as both parents step up, it can go smoothly.

What happens when one of the step-parents is demanding to be paid to ‘babysit’ the child when they are at their house?

The mom in this story is having to deal with this from her ex’s new partner and thinks she may have overreacted.

Check it out.

AITA for refusing to pay my child’s step mother to “babysit” them?

Okay so before I start, I should say that my son is 5 – and only in the past 3-6 months has the father and his partner been consistent in his life.

Anyway – my son’s father sees him for two nights every fortnight.

He picks him up late Friday night and drops him off early Sunday morning every two weeks.

Wow, that is very generous.

Now when he first started being consistent, I would offer money to make sure my son was fed and safe.

I only did this because for the last 5 years he would give excuses of “I have no money to feed him” or “I have no petrol”.

My son adores his dad, so I offered the money so that he had no excuse not to spend time with our son.

Better late than never I guess.

After about the third time of being consistent, his dad said “you don’t need to offer me money anymore, I’m working full time and want to step up more”.

I didn’t ask for child support, I never have.

Everything my son has, all his toys, all his clothes, all his school stuff, every experience his had – I have paid for and I am proud of that fact.

Wow, bold move.

Fast forward to a month ago and I received a message from my son’s stepmum.

(They aren’t married but have been together for three years, have a child together and are engaged so it’s easier to describe her as step mum).

The message had said that it isn’t financially fair on them to have to pay for things my son wants when with them.

She has asked for $100 a night – so $200 a fortnight; to pay for his food, clothes, anywhere they go and any toys he wants when with them.

I responded with, “if he wants a toy when with you, either you or his father can message me and I will happily transfer the money to one of you – as long as the toy comes home with him”.

What?

She said it was “irresponsible parenting” on my behalf for not wanting my son to have nice clothes and toys when at his dad’s house and that anything bought with them should stay with them.

I agreed and said anything THEY buy for him, should stay.

She then made a big deal and posted on social media about how I’m a bad mother and refuse to take financial responsibility for my son.

I screenshot it and sent it to his father, and explained the situation to him.

He apologised and said he had no idea.

This woman is obviously manipulating him.

She then messaged me accusing me of trying to break up their relationship because I am a jealous ex and that she doesn’t think it’s right that she should have to “babysit” my child for free.

I said that’s fine, if my son isn’t seen as part of your family and is just a child being babysat – then maybe the custody situation should be revised.

I know it’s harsh because I don’t blame my son’s dad, I’m just at such a loss and feel like a major jerk.

AITA?

He needs to step up.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say.

A sit down with dad is necessary.

This commenter has a very plausible theory.

A legal custody agreement might be necessary.

Yeah, the step-mom is way out of line.

This person suggests keeping all communication between her and the dad.

Wow!

Step-mom is being ridiculous!

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.