As parents, we always want to see our children’s “firsts.”

This mom shares that her daughter is turning 4 years old.

She and her husband planned a birthday party for her, but the little girl’s grandparents have also prepared something for her on the eve of her birthday.

Now the mom is upset.

Read the story below to see if she’s being unreasonable or not.

AITA for refusing that my parents have a birthday celebration for my daughter?

My husband (38M) and I (36F) have a daughter who will shortly turn 4.

She usually stays once a week at my parents’ place.

She is very close to them.

They like having her around.

This woman agreed that her daughter would stay in her parents’ house once a week.

They are always very (too) willing to watch her.

They demand to spend time with her weekly whenever possible.

We found an agreement that she would sleep at their place once a week.

Which, I have to admit, is also nice for us as it gives us some alone time.

It was never an issue for them to let her stay with her grandparents.

However, I have to stress out that the primary reason for it is this:

My parents want to spend time with her.

And it’s never an issue for us to do differently.

She and her husband made plans for her daughter’s birthday.

This year, the evening she’s scheduled to spend with them is on the eve of her birthday.

We have planned a big party for her the day after.

All her friends and also grandparents were invited.

I have asked my parents to refrain from celebrating early with her.

My husband and I would like to be with her when she blows her candles.

But her parents had other plans, too.

My parents strongly disagree.

They planned to go out for dinner with her and have a cake at the restaurant.

I’m not comfortable with that.

So I said she won’t go sleep with them if they can’t do as we, the parents, ask.

Now, the grandparents think they’re too controlling.

They’ve called us controlling and said we are hogging our daughter, that she can have a life outside of us.

So, am I the jerk?

Uh oh! I can see both sides, but she’s only 4 years old. Obviously the parents want to be there for the celebration! Maybe they could all go out to dinner before she spends the night.

Let’s check out the comments of other people on Reddit.

This user shares their point of view.

Here’s a perfectly valid response.

This person thinks there is no harm in having 2 birthday parties.

This comment makes sense.

You have to let some things go, says this person.

Having too many people love and care for your child shouldn’t be an issue at all.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.