How would you react if you spent a lot of time and energy planning a birthday party for your significant other only to have your mother-in-law criticize everything you planned and bring up the idea of throwing another party that she would plan?

Would you let her take over, or would you feel hurt?

In today’s story, a woman is in this situation, and she is not sure if her mother-in-law is out of line or if she is making a big deal out of nothing.

Read on for the full story.

AITA my mother in law wants to organize a second party for my husband

My husband is turning 40 next week. My husband is refusing to have anyone except extended family at his party- which is still 20 people.

So I started organizing a month ago, designing a simple invite, booking a restaurant, organizing decoration and a cake.

I sent out the invite a few days ago… and no one in his immediate family said anything.

Everyone else has rsvped to say they will be there.

I assumed obviously they would all be coming.

Ah yes, the classic “Thanks for planning, but here’s how you did it all wrong” speech.

Today over dinner my mother in law proceeds to tell me that the dinner is starting too early, what starters we must order and that no one will want to eat the the cake I’ve booked which is probably too small and not the right flavour.

Then she asks my husband if he is “sure that he doesn’t want her to throw that party for all his other friends at lunch” – I had no idea she had been asking him about throwing him another party.

I was shocked because generally I (and the rest of the family) let her get her way in almost everything.

Context wise we are Asian, she is a tiger mum, she loves to be in control, she is very generous but a domineering personality and can be quite a competent but insecure leader.

Generous with gifts, stingy with control.

Think of the crazy rich asians Michelle Yeoh personality??? (When the movie came out everyone said that character resembled her.)

I put up with a lot of her criticism and usually keep my mouth shut but thank God don’t live in the same house so it’s fine and I’m very patient and forgiving.

But after all the effort I had put in… 🥲 I told my husband how unhappy I was that she needed to hijack this special occasion and that he didn’t stand up for me (he chose the early start time and the cake flavour!!!)

So AITA and making a big deal out of this????

After all that effort, should this just be shrugged off, or is she crossing the line?

Let’s see what Reddit users think about this situation.

This person thinks MIL and Hubby are spineless.

This person says a Mommy Boy like this is definitely the AH.

This person has some good advice.

MIL doesn’t attend parties—she takes over them.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.