Weddings are expensive, even is you’re just a guest.

When someone asks you to stand up with them, you have to be aware that saying yes will cost you some dough – but in this story, being in a bridal party is no party after all.

Let’s see if these wedding bells are ringing.

WIBTA if I asked my husband to step down as groomsman?

My husband’s best friend asked him to be a groomsman months ago, and of course he said yes.

We were both excited to go to the wedding.

Unfortunately, our financial situation has gotten very bad.

My husband works for the US government and we’re terrified he’s going to get laid off.

Working for the government has usually been a stable gig, but nowadays? Less so.

They are also behind on reimbursing him for work travel, so we had to borrow money from his parents to pay the mortgage and we’re behind on every bill.

I’m a freelance writer, but I’m also the full-time caregiver to our toddler, so I can only work when he’s asleep.

My financial contributions have gone down significantly in the past year because I’m usually caregiving/ cleaning.

We already decided that my husband can’t go to the bachelor party (a weekend in a $$$ city) because we can’t afford it.

Bachelor weekends can cost big bucks, that’s for sure.

We also decided that I will not attend the wedding – it’s in a different state and we can’t pay for two plane tickets (or childcare since it’s a child-free wedding).

The groomsmen are also required to wear customized suits, and we just don’t have the money for a custom suit.

The one they’re going to wear is $500.

Not terrible for suit, but a lot for a tight budget.

I already offered to find a suit for rental that’s as close to the other suits as possible, but they (understandably) really want everyone to be matching.

I feel really guilty about not bringing in more money so that my husband can do what he wants.

I already try to minimize my financial footprint as much as possible – I cut my own hair, take on as many freelance assignments as I can, don’t buy myself things.

Uh-oh sounds like self-care is slipping through the cracks.

In the past two years I’ve turned down invitations for two weddings, one bachelorette weekend, and two baby showers because they were all out of state and I couldn’t justify the cost of the plane ticket + travel expenses.

I try to do as much as I can to save money for our family and I feel awful that I can’t do more.

I can’t sell my eggs because I’m a carrier for cystic fibrosis and I can’t be a surrogate because I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression.

Whoa, those are some intense side gigs.

I’m trying to find a job that allows my son to tag along, like delivering groceries.

WIBTA if I asked him to just attend as a guest instead? I feel so defeated and inadequate.

This sounds like a tight financial situation.

What do the comments have to say?

One person points out, you gotta take care of yourself first.

Someone else mentions, it’s good to be prepared for worst case scenario.

Another user points out, the bride and groom should have their priorities straight.

This poster says, we’re all just doin’ our best.

One poster says, maybe the hubby needs to reevaluate his role in the household.

This couple needs something borrowed to attend a wedding – like, money.

What a weird expectation.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.