After years, or even decades, it’s easy for couples to get stuck in a rut.

She’s always done the washing, so she always will do the washing.

He’s always had control of the TV remote, so he always will have control of the TV remote.

That is, until one or both parties get a wake up call to shake things up and actually show the other a little consideration.

And for the woman in this story, it’s about time that happens.

So she’s trying to give her husband that wake-up call, but he’s just not budging.

Read on to find out what has her questioning whether their marriage is really worth it.

AITA for being upset that my husband did nothing for our 24th anniversary?

I am a 45-year-old woman married to a 49-year-old man with a long history of absolutely no planning of dates, events, or holidays. I have long been the only one to execute these things because he just won’t.

We have two grown daughters and I went back to school to finish my BS degree two years ago. Four classes to go and I’m done!

We both work full time, and of course I am expected to keep doing all the household responsibilities I always have, on top of school full time.

Eventually, something had to give.

So I stopped planning everything: no dates, no vacations, no holiday gatherings, nothing.

Read on to find out the impact this had on her family.

Two years later, and he mentioned that we never do anything anymore.

So I explained why.

Fast forward to last night, which our 24th wedding anniversary. I had to work the previous weekend and I was finishing a class, so I didn’t plan anything.

I got him a fitness tracker watch: nothing fancy, but it was something. I sent him a text in the morning saying happy anniversary, to which I received no reply for four hours.

In his reply he asked what I wanted do tonight, leaving it to me once again.

I gave him a few names of restaurants that were open and said let’s just go to dinner.

But that just wasn’t enough.

I work from home. He got home at around 4:30pm, and came into my office asking about dinner.

I told him I don’t care where we went, just to pick one because I was working.

He came back a few minutes later to tell me that we don’t really like the only options that are open on a Monday, so why doesn’t he just go buy some nice fish at the butcher and we will stay in.

I said that sounds fine, but it’s 4:45pm and they might be closing soon. I said, “I’m working can you just figure it out?”

He looked perturbed at that and left.

And the situation just kept getting worse.

The butcher was closed by the time he got there.

I got off work to see that he was outside, sitting on his phone.

I gave him his gift, saying sorry it’s not a big deal but here you go.

He didn’t move, so I started doing laundry and all the normal things.

When he came in, I was upset and told him I was hurt because he can never plan anything.

He proceeded to list off the evening events, justifying why we weren’t doing anything: we don’t like the restaurant choices, so we will do something tomorrow.

I had angry tears I was holding back, and said “fine, we probably should go tomorrow then.” (I was in no mood to go anywhere with him at that point).

Then, her husband dealt the final blow.

Then he told me that my gift would replace other watch, so I could just return it.

At that point I got mad, shut down and walked away.

He spent rest of the night outside and then went to bed without a word to me, while I had peanut butter sandwich and watched TV by myself.

I never received a card, a gift, or anything. I’m not materialistic at all, I could care less what it is, I just want to be thought of.

He did something similar on Valentines Day, asking if I wanted to celebrate but we did nothing because I didn’t plan anything.

I’m just upset, knowing that he has never and will never plan ahead for anything – except maybe a fishing trip, hunting trip, or boys weekend, which he has planned in last two years.

AITA?

Sure, her communication isn’t great, but this woman is just looking for a little bit of care and attention from her husband.

Is that too much to ask?

Let’s see what Reddit had to say about this.

This person gave the woman a clear reality check.

And others decoded his lame excuses.

While many Redditors simply said it as it is.

She deserves so much better.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.