In a marriage, finding a balance between control and concern isn’t always easy.

When one concerned partner decided to stop funding their wife’s smoking habit, she saw it as an unfair power move instead of a loving gesture.

Read on for the full story!

AITA for telling my wife to quit smoking

My wife likes to smoke cigarettes, but I tell her for her own health and financial reasons that I think it would be best if she did either or not both of them.

I tell her that she is only damaging her lungs in the long run.

But she tells me that I am being too controlling with what she does.

So they try and meet her halfway.

So I compromised with her and told her that if she wants to do both, then she has to use her own money for it — not our joint account or my money — or save the money to get it herself, and that I will not be going to buy them for her.

So AITA?

They thought setting financial limits would spark a healthier future for them both, but their wife didn’t see it that way.

What did Reddit think?

There’s quite a bit of nuance to unpack in this situation.

This person is completely right to not use their money for something that’s harming a loved one and themselves.

It’s not wrong to care about a loved one’s wellbeing.

This user thinks they should just accept that smoking is just part of who their partner is.

Even the most caring gestures can be misunderstood.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.