Aren’t you supposed to ask folks before you buy a gift for someone and expect them to chip in on it?

I sure thought so!

But maybe I’m just old-fashioned like that…

Is this person a jerk for not wanting to give their brother money after he bought a gift for their mom without asking first?

Read on and see what you think…

AITA for refusing to chip in for an expensive gift I wasn’t consulted on?

“My family has a tradition of pooling money for birthday gifts.

We usually keep it reasonable…around $50 per person.

It’s always been a casual arrangement, and we discuss it before anyone buys something.

What?!?!

This year, my brother (let’s call him Jake) decided to order a gift for our mom without asking anyone.

When he sent the message telling us how much we each owed, I was shocked—it was almost four times what we normally contribute.

I don’t even think she’ll use the gift, since she already has similar things collecting dust and he also spent about double than what I would’ve found this gift for. It’s so expensive buying it used would’ve also been a smarter option and in this case wouldn’t have made a difference.

I told Jake that this was way out of budget for me and that I’d rather do my own gift.

Now, I’m getting guilt-tripped with things like “Well, we already bought it” and “We don’t have the money to cover your share”.

He probably shouldn’t have done it this way…

He even called me, assuming I just couldn’t afford it, and asked if I could contribute whatever I can.

But I find it weird to act like I paid the same as everyone else when I didn’t.

To that he said it’s better than the others having to increase their share much more because of me…

Important context: In the past, Jake has given my mom expensive gifts, and I suspect she might have just told him, “Buy me this,” assuming he’d cover it himself.

He used to have extra money, but he doesn’t anymore. So now, after already buying it, he’s expecting us to split it.

I feel like this isn’t my problem, but am I the jerk for opting out and doing my own gift instead?”

Check out what folks had to say on Reddit.

This person said they’re NTA.

Another individual shared their thoughts.

This reader chimed in.

Another individual spoke up.

And one Reddit user offered some advice.

It’s customary to ask about these things first…

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.