He’s 18, recently aged out of foster care, and working two jobs while secretly sleeping in the martial arts gym where he teaches.

His girlfriend?

She has no idea—because he’s been hiding the fact that he’s homeless.

Now she’s starting to notice something’s off, and he’s wondering if he’s the jerk… or just trying to survive with dignity.

Check it out.

AITAH for hiding that I’m homeless from my girlfriend?

I’m 18M and I’m dating my girlfriend who just turned 20.

I’ve been in foster care since I was 13.

I lucked out when I was younger, I had some good homes but the most recent one I had was really bad.

I’ve been homeless for 1 month now.

It’s been exhausting hiding it from my girlfriend.

Guess she’s never been to your place…

One of the jobs I work is at a local martial arts gym in my city which I sneak back into at night because I have keys for lock up.

I am pretty sure the owner knows I’m sleeping here because there are cameras.

He hasn’t said anything. Sometimes he leaves me food.

So I’m doing okay for being homeless.

I’m saving up and I’m trying to find another job so I can make money faster and find a place to live.

I’m staying out of trouble. I don’t drink alcohol and I don’t do drugs.

What a relief.

My girlfriend lives in a university dorm with a roommate.

She goes to a prestigious school that she worked really hard to get into.

Tonight, she said I have ‘sad eyes’ and she asked me if something was wrong.

I wanted to break down and tell her everything.

Instead, I said I was sleepy and hugged her then made a joke which distracted her and changed the topic.

Not a smart move…

I know in a relationship, you’re supposed to be honest.

But I guess I have pride or something.

All these years growing up, there were so many times I felt like I had no dignity, so it’s really hard for me to let go of this ‘pride’ or whatever you want to call it.

It’s hard to explain.

Besides, she can’t really help me. It would just be adding to her stress.

AITAH for thinking I can find a place, get settled in, basically fix this problem and then tell her?

Redditors were heartbroken and impressed—many said honesty is key, but respected his strength and self-awareness.

Most people said NTA, but urged him to let her in just a little.

Some people sympathized with him.

And some people made jokes (funny ones).

Sleeping on gym mats and still thinking about her stress?

Says a lot.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.