My husband and I both work and live in Silicon Valley. He makes 3x more than I do but I have to work and contribute as much of my income as possible to household expenses.

He pays for most things and I am expected to do all the things involving caring for him, the kids, our home, etc.

My daughter asked for a party at home this year for her birthday. She wanted a sleepover but all her friends’ parents said the girls weren’t ready for that. So with my husband’s advice I planned an evening sleepover themed party.

They didn’t agree on anything after that.

As I was planning I came across really cute tipi style tents with air mattresses that I thought would be perfect.

My husband was totally against it. He felt like having a party at home should be done cheap.

In previous years we’ve spent anywhere from $500 to $1000 on parties for the kids. The tipis cost $250, and I bought decor for around an additional $100.

He demanded I throw them away immediately following the party because he didn’t want them piling up in the garage.

In total we spent about $500 on her party.

He got even more upset.

The final straw for him was our daughter asking to go to a Disney Concert after we started planning her party and he knew we were going to do it for her.

As a result he flipped out.

I responded with a few things: he was being very mean and negative about every part of our daughter’s birthday and towards our kids in general; he has had hundreds of dollars worth of large expensive Lego sets sitting in boxes in our dining room UNOPENED for YEARS and it was a turn off (because he was demanding “spicy time” in exchange for getting things for our daughter’s party).

Now the atmosphere sucks.

The result, he hasn’t spoken to me in days.

He’s denying giving me the silent treatment, but he’s been quiet, moping, and isolating himself. He didn’t even speak to or spend time with our daughter on her birthday. He locked himself in our room and had my son bring him drinks and food all night during her party.

Now the party is behind us and I know he deliberately did that to avoid having to pay for anything else in hopes the party and something would fail so he could say “I told you so “. Or prove without his money we would have nothing and that’s why we should be more appreciative of him.

AITAH, but also is what I said and did genuinely being ungrateful of my husband?

She just wanted to give her daughter a fun birthday party. Her husband was being completely unreasonable.

Here is what people are saying on Reddit.

This sounds better.

Toxic to a T.

Nice idea!

I bet she could get a good price from last minute party parents.

Yep. He won’t grow up.

I wonder when he’ll stop pouting.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.