Working in retail means you hear insults so ridiculous they almost deserve applause.

Over the years, one retail worker collected a personal highlight reel of some of the most absurd ones.

Looking back, it’s hard not to laugh at some of them!

You’ll want to read on for this one.

Best/worst insults from customers?!

Some of mine!

1. “You’ve ruined my Christmas” — because I refused an alcohol sale for no I.D. I just smiled and said, “That’s fine.”
2. “Shove it up your ***!” Walks off, turns around… “And it’s a big enough ***!” Like, do these people think I’m unaware that I’m fat? Or that their opinion matters to me?!
3. “Look at your face, you look ridiculous.” Same man as before, presumably referring to the fact I was wearing a bit of glitter on my eyes as it was nearly Christmas! Ah yes, I’m definitely going to take makeup advice off some crusty middle-aged man.
4. “It’s an abuse of power!” — for refusing an age-restricted sale because no I.D. I enquired as to what sort of power the customers felt I had?!
5. The traditional “jobsworth” — for refusing an age-restricted sale. I responded, “Are you going to find me another job when I get fired and pay my fine?” When repeating the story to a friend, I said, “I got called a jobsworth today… by a ****,” which made them chuckle!

I’ve worked in retail for 15 years. There’s got to be more, but those are the most recent ones that spring to mind!

Retail taught her two things: patience and how to keep a straight face when someone calls you ridiculous names.

Reddit is sure to get a kick out of these.

Some customers are quick to go low.

Sometimes you just have to laugh so you don’t cry.

“Ruining my Christmas” seems to be a common one.

Sometimes telling off a customer is worth the consequences.

At the time, these insults felt like jabs, but now they feel like material for a stand-up comedy set.

It’s hard to hold a grudge when the punchline is that good.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a customer who insists that their credit card works, and finds out that isn’t the case.