Parenting is hard for everyone.

It can be even trickier when you’re parenting someone else’s child.

In this story, one man and his wife accepted the guardianship of his niece after a clash between her and her stepmom erupted at home.

Now, the girl’s dad and uncle are clashing over the best way to parent this grieving teenage girl.

Read the full story below for all the details.

AITA for letting my niece have fun when she lives with me because of the cruel stuff she wrote and said to her stepmother?

In June of this year, my niece Abby (15) came to live with me (28M), and I became her legal guardian alongside my partner.

My brother is her father. Abby’s mom died when she was 9, and my brother remarried when she was 11.

Abby was never very happy about my brother’s remarriage or my SIL.

It was clear to everyone, and mostly she just ignored her stepmother, but there were outbursts here and there when her stepmother tried to parent her.

SIL’s birthday is in May, and my brother threw her a family party birthday dinner.

Abby was asked to write her a card and give it to her with a gift my brother bought for SIL on Abby’s behalf.

This man’s niece, Abby, said horrible things to her stepmom.

I can’t remember word for word what Abby wrote and said, but to summarize:

She told SIL she hated her, that she never wanted her to marry her dad, and that she wasn’t as good as her mom.

She called SIL ugly, said her mom was prettier. She said her mom was a better cook than SIL and brought up compliments her mom used to get on her cooking.

She said a million SILs would not be worth even half of her mom.

She said she was glad SIL and my brother could not have kids and that she hoped every day that SIL would never get to stay pregnant.

There were also insults about SIL’s sense of style and how ugly the stuff was that she brought into the house.

She called SIL an outsider, brought up her mom being the love of my brother’s life and not SIL.

And she mentioned several times that she would never love her or accept her or want her around, and how happy she’d be if they divorced.

So he and his wife became Abby’s guardian.

There were attempts made to stop Abby, but she told her dad she’d finish since she was forced to give SIL anything at all. Then my brother tried making her apologize.

He put her on a waiting list for therapy and punished her, tried talking to her, tried using therapy books to get an apology or regret out of her.

But when nothing came in the first month, he said someone else needed to take her in because SIL being around Abby was not good after all the stuff she said.

My partner and I offered, as long as guardianship was given to us, if this was more than a week or two deal, which it was always planned to be.

Abby started being happy again, but her dad didn’t like it.

Since moving in with us, Abby has started therapy.

She hasn’t apologized or expressed regret. She has not wanted to see SIL, has actually said she’s happy to no longer live with her. She has seen my brother 1–2 times most weeks.

Now he’s grumbling that Abby isn’t restricted from having fun and living her life. That we let her spend time with friends, go to the movies, and do other things teens want to do.

He told me she should be on full grounding until she apologizes, and especially now that she got her way and isn’t around SIL anymore.

He said he felt it was a given.

He disagrees.

And I told him he said nothing about that, only that she needed to be in therapy, and she is.

And I told him the therapist said she could be grounded for 20 years (if that were even possible) and still not get to what he wants.

He said she doesn’t deserve to have a fun life, and I should agree with that.

AITA?

Teen angst and a stepmom? Recipe for huge drama.

Let’s see what other readers on Reddit think about this story.

Here’s an idea.

Well done, says this person.

Wise words from this person.

Here’s another way to look at it.

And a shrewd observation.

Let teens be teens.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.