A first birthday party is a much bigger deal for the parents than it is for the baby. The baby won’t remember the party, but for the parents, it’s a huge milestone and worth celebrating.

What would you do if a family member turned a simple first birthday party into a huge event and offered to pay for it, but when you clashed on parenting styles, they withdrew their help from the party? Would you apologize and let them have their way in hopes that they’d still help, or would you simply take over the party planning and pay for everything yourself?

In this story, one woman is in this situation with her aunt, who was a huge help planning and paying for her daughter’s first birthday party.

Now, they’re arguing, and she’s not sure who is in the wrong.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITAH for correcting my aunt?

This weekend my husband and I are hosting my daughter’s first birthday party.

Originally, it was supposed to be a much smaller get-together with about 25 guests.

I needed a location since my apartment is small and I asked my aunt if we could use her backyard, and from there she kinda escalated the party.

For extra context, my aunt and uncle are well off and invite us to dinner often, gift clothes and toys to my baby and are very generous.

They really are generous!

She ended up renting a venue and suddenly it turned into a much bigger party than I had planned.

She volunteered to handle a lot of things like hiring a balloon artist for decorations and ordering a custom cake.

My husband and I were excited because everything seemed taken care of.

This would be very frustrating.

But a few days ago, my aunt and I had a disagreement about how to care for my daughter.

She was constantly trying to feed her things I wasn’t comfortable with, she took control of her at times without asking and insisting we do things her way with my baby.

Whenever I tried to stand up to her and tell her “no” it turned into a power struggle. I felt like she was being disrespectful to me as a mom.

So when she pushed us on dropping the baby off with her, I was honest and said I didn’t want to leave my baby with her until I knew I could trust her to follow the boundaries i’ve set.

The aunt didn’t take that well.

She was furious but we dropped it since we were at a restaurant.

The next day, she canceled the cake and the balloons and told me to handle it myself. She said she is extremely hurt because she just wanted a good relationship with my daughter and we are taking her for granted and we are ungrateful. She said she canceled because she doesn’t want to be “between” us anymore, or bother us.

I feel like she gave her word and to fall through just because of a disagreement is petty and wrong.

She didn’t plan on paying for a big party on her own.

Now I’m stressed. Because I was trusting her to take care of those things, I never ordered them or budgeted for them and with 50 guests expected this weekend.

I ended up ordering both things myself today. But I am so hurt by her actions.

I feel like she tried to “buy” us. Like pay for our dinner or something in exchange for her to do however she pleases and the moment I say something about it she throws out our relationship because we are ungrateful for everything she’s done for us.

So… AITAH?

It’s too bad the aunt turned the party into a bigger event and then decided to stop helping at the last minute just because she couldn’t get her way. The aunt needs to realize that she’s not the parent and the parents get to decide things like what their child can and cannot eat.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

The aunt does not get to make parenting decisions no matter how much money she spends.

The aunt is trying to manipulate her with money.

A big party isn’t necessarily a good idea.

The aunt reacted in a really immature way.

When help has strings attached, it’s better to cut ties.

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