Sometimes, doing your best to keep peace in the family still isn’t enough.

So, what would you do if your parents planned a big family cruise years in advance, but your new job made it impossible to take that much time off? Would you promise to be there, even if it caused problems at your job? Or would you warn them that you may not be able to make it?

In the following story, one junior doctor finds herself in this very situation and has done all she can. Here’s the full scoop.

AITAH for not being able to commit to a cruise my parents booked?

Two years ago my parents booked a cruise for me as a birthday/graduation present. This is when I was still in medical school.

I had told them at the time I didn’t know if I’d get leave but they assured I would and booked it.

I’ve now started working as a junior doctor in the NHS, and I don’t have a rota for my next rotation yet, which is when the cruise is booked for. I would need over two weeks off for this holiday.

My parents have been continually asking me to get the days off, and I’ve explained that, 1) the rota does not exist yet, and 2) I’m worried I won’t get the time off as I get 9 days of annual leave per job ( every four months).

She tried to get an answer, but wasn’t able to.

When I told them this, my dad said I was lying to them, and the real reason is that I didn’t want to go.

I ended up emailing the rota person and explaining the situation.

I was told they can try to accommodate, but can’t guarantee anything.

I told my parents this again, and my dad told me he just thinks I don’t want to go. He says I’ve known about the cruise for two years, so I should have sorted it. He says I have too much going on in my life, like “that girl” and my work.

For context, that girl is my girlfriend, and my parents don’t support my relationship.

Now, both of her parents are upset.

They’ve both expressed extreme disappointment in this, threatened not to be in my life anymore. My mother has told me it made her feel bad, and I need to help her with it.

My mum asked me to explain how annual leave works, and she seemed skeptical.

They’re now saying they’re cancelling the full trip and have lost money from it, including the deposit.

I told them they should go themselves, and I’d want them to.

They have told me no, and why would they want to do that?

Now I feel terrible. It was never my intention to waste their money, plans, or time, but I genuinely can’t control my schedule.

AITA?

Yikes! It sounds like she did what she could.

Let’s see how the folks over at Reddit suggest she handle this situation.

This reader gets it.

Here’s someone who puts it into perspective.

According to this person, they wouldn’t go either.

For this person, it was all about control for her parents.

She shouldn’t feel bad.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.