A 26-year-old CNA is exhausted—working long shifts, commuting three hours a day, paying nearly every bill, and raising a child—while her husband drifts between excuses and unemployment.

After buying him cars, covering rent, and watching him let his tattoo license lapse, she’s left wondering if she’s wrong for wanting out of a marriage that feels more like babysitting a dependent than building a partnership.

Read on for the story.

AITA for wanting to leave my husband

I (26F) have been married to my husband (29M) for a few years now. We have a 7 year old child.

I work full-time as a CNA, pulling long shifts and commuting (1.5 hours away. Total 3), and I’m also planning for nursing school. (I bring home 1k a week).

Unfortunately, I don’t see that happening anytime soon. I cover the majority of our bills and try to budget carefully so we can stay afloat and have stability for our family.

However, he always comes up short with rent. Can’t pay a single bill, at least not consistently. I can’t depend on him.

He says that he does contribute, but doesn’t realize that helping pay rent every other three months is not contributing.

Woof.

I’ve bought this man two cars. One of them I had a family inheritance (10k) and was going to use it to get ahead on bills that were behind.

I thought it would be best to buy a car with that because he would depend on my car to drive himself to work, which kind of limited my freedom, and conflicted our work schedules.

Well, the 2013 Mercedes has been sitting in the driveway for almost a year now because the alternator went out 2 weeks later, has never been registered, and I just can’t afford that on top of literally everything that I’m carrying.

He’s still used my car. Well now- his license is suspended and he has a 450$ ticket he needs to pay.

Well that’s not good.

The issue is my husband hasn’t been consistent with work. He’s a tattoo artist, and while he’s super talented, his license expired and he hasn’t gotten it reinstated. On top of that he’s gotten fired from his job. 🙃

When I ask about it, he says it’s complicated or that he needs tax paperwork to reinstate, but he hasn’t taken the steps to fix it. In the meantime, he puts in a few job applications here and there, but then tells me “they never call back” or blames the economy.

Instead of looking for stable income. When I talk to him about, he either changes the topic, or says something where it feels like he is not taking me seriously. It’s so frustrating.

Extremely.

I love him deeply and don’t want to end things, but I can’t shake the feeling that I’m carrying everything alone.

I don’t feel financially safe, and it’s putting strain on our relationship.

I’ve told him I want stability, a steady job, responsibility with bills, but it feels like I’m being gaslit because he’s convinced my family I’m “the crazy one” for being upset about it.

Wow, rude.

I finally had ENOUGH a couple weeks ago, was going to pack all of my things and go somewhere I didn’t even care where.

And he contacted my family and I’m not sure how the conversation went or what he said, but I saw messages of all of pulling my past traumas and how it affects the way that I act, and that I’m unstable and have always ran away from my problems.

Which made me super upset, I ended blocking all of them. I want to leave but I feel so stuck because my husband has turned into my dependent. I can’t afford to move out because I’m stuck in this sick cycle.

What a pickle.

Part of me feels guilty for even thinking about divorce “just over money.”

But at the same time, it’s not just money it’s responsibility, partnership, and feeling like I can trust him to have my back. Im sick that I enabled this behavior.

So… AITA for wanting to leave my husband because I don’t feel financially secure with him?

Reddit firmly called her NTA—marriage is about shared responsibility, and she’s already been carrying more than her fair share.

Wanting stability and a reliable partner isn’t selfish, it’s survival.

This person says to get a lawyer asap.

This person has some good advice.

This person really empathizes, as do many others.

When “for richer or poorer” starts feeling like “all on you forever,” it’s no wonder she’s ready to walk.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.