It’s funny how trying to help someone can turn you into the villain in someone else’s story.

Imagine your niece wanted a life her father refused to support, and you were the one person who could give her a real chance. But stepping in might make your own brother see you as an enemy.

Would you stay out of it? Or would you offer to help her anyway?

In the following story, one aunt finds herself in this predicament and wants to help, but is unsure if she should.

Here’s what happened.

WIBTA for inviting my niece to stay in my place so she can go to university?

My brother (38) and I (36) are first-generation immigrants. Our mother fled her country overnight on foot because of the war. Our father **** during that.

She worked cleaning jobs until she eventually landed a permanent cleaning position at a university. Because her shift started at about 6:00, my brother and I spent a lot of time there.

We’d stay with her until school started, go to school, and then often meet her back at the university after. Because of this, my brother developed a resentment towards “university people,” and I didn’t.

Even though they didn’t go to college, the siblings did well.

Fast forward to today: both of us did well, even though neither of us went to university.

My brother owns a construction company. He lives outside the city, and his daughter spent a lot of time after school with our mom (who still works at the same university, but now in an administrative role in the cleaning staff).

My niece is about to finish school and wants to go to university. This came as no surprise to my mom or me.

Her niece was upset at her father’s words.

At a family dinner, my brother told his daughter that he doesn’t want her to go to university because it’s “a waste of time” (not money, uni is free here) and “a machine that turns healthy, hardworking kids into pretentious, lazy, worthless people.”

Understandably, my niece didn’t take this well. She said that a university education is necessary for what she wants to do in the future. My brother responded with, “I didn’t go to university, and I did well, so you can too.”

My mom is a very quiet, stoic person. I’ve never seen her start a conflict unless absolutely necessary. She stayed silent until there was a silence, and said, “I had to run from a country with two babies. I would never wish that on you, even though I did well in the end.”

Then, he had to backtrack.

You could literally see my brother melt after this.

He immediately started, “That’s not what I meant.” But afterwards, he added that going to university would be impossible anyway because his daughter could never afford a dorm or an apartment in the university city. (HE perfectly could, though, it’s about ~€400 for a room, but that’s not my business)

This was strange to my mom and me, because my niece already stays with one of us fairly often when she has late school days or early days in the city.

She just doesn’t see the problem.

We’ve never been the type of family to interfere in each other’s parenting decisions.

But I have an extra room in my apartment, and I would genuinely be happy to offer it to my niece so she could study and fulfil her dream of going to uni.

But I also realize that this would go against my brother’s authority as a parent.

AITA?

Wow! It’s understandable why her brother feels that way, but it’s his daughter’s life.

Let’s see how the folks over at Reddit feel about what she offered.

According to this reader, she should help anyway.

Here’s someone who gets it.

For this reader, it’s all love for their mother.

Yet another person who thinks she should help.

She should do what’s right, and that’s help her niece pursue her goals. Her brother can get over it.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.