Not knowing who your biological father is could be an unimaginable torment.

If a child turned up one day and claimed to be your son, would you believe him or insist of a paternity test?

The man in this story met a young man who believed he was his father. They took a paternity test, and the results were devastating.

Keep reading below for the heartbreaking full story.

AITA for not being part of “my” kid’s life?

From 18-25, I was an absolute wild child. Lots of beer and lots of hook-ups where we didn’t even know each other’s names. I was dealing with lots of damage, to the point where I don’t even remember most of those years.

Now at almost 40, I’m much better now, with therapy and AA and my saint of a wife, but that’s the important background.

I was clear with my wife that it’s quite possible I have some kids out there somewhere, though a lot of the women I slept with, I have no way of contacting them to be sure.

My wife budgeted in some savings for if we ever have to pay child support for a couple of kids, but just asked that I get a paternity test before we welcome them in. We have no kids of our own. We don’t really want any.

This man and his supposed son took a paternity test.

Last year, a 16-year-old boy contacted me, saying that I was his father. We’ll call him K. K claimed to be the son of one of my old classmates, and that his mom had raised him by herself because she didn’t want to cause any trouble.

But she had told him about me, all the time, and he had spent a lot of his life googling me. He’d finally worked up the courage to contact me, and asked if we could meet.

Since I can neither confirm nor deny sleeping with his mother, I agreed to meet between our two towns, me driving about 5 hours and him driving about 45 minutes.

He agreed to the paternity test.

I did tell him about my wife’s request.

He was fine with it.

We met after the kit got here, he did the spit thing, gave it back, and we sat, talked, had lunch, and drove back home.

They were not a match, and the kid was devastated.

We were not a match.

I had my profile done a while ago, just so it was out there in case any kids found me that way. But K and I are not related. I contacted him, gave him all his data, and let him down gently.

He was devastated. Crying, claiming it wasn’t real, that he had spent his entire life idolizing me, that I had to be his dad.

He begged to have a relationship, but I’m not entirely interested in building one with a random child.

I apologized again, but left it at that.

But that wasn’t the end of it.

His mom reached out, begging me as well, saying that she was so sure I was the father, that it’s destroying him not knowing who his dad is.

I said it was a real shame, but that father isn’t me. I’m not dad material, especially not for someone else’s kid.

This just came up in a convo recently, and sparked an argument. Some say it’s fine, others say it was cruel to abandon a kid who spent his entire life believing he was mine.

Am I the jerk here?

The truth hurts, but forcing a bond might hurt more.

The comments section on Reddit is full of opinions.

This person has something to say.

Here is some praise for the wife.

Here’s a valid point.

This person is calling out the boy’s mom.

This makes sense.

Living in truth is better than a false relationship.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.