When you’re growing up, the idea of living with your friends sounds like a hoot.

But the reality? Sure it can be great, but you can also find out too late that there are things about your friend that really bother you – things that would never really have come up if you weren’t under the same roof.

If they’re unusually noisy, lazy, disruptive, or otherwise present a barrier to you living the life you want, you might find it hard to tolerate them.

And that’s exactly what the woman in this story found out when she moved in with a friend.

Read on to find out what happened between them.

AITA for choosing not to renew our lease even though it will raise my friend’s rent?

I (female, eighteen) moved in with my roommate (female, twenty) about four months ago.

She’s one of my closest friends and she’s genuinely one of the sweetest people I know, which is why this situation is so hard.

I have no interest in renewing our lease at the end of June, and here’s why: she uses my things without my permission.

For example, she’ll go into my room and take my fan and or my air mattress from my closet when I’m not home. This wouldn’t be a problem if she would just ask me first (also, she also never puts things back).

But there’s more to their incompatibility than that.

Our ideas of clean are also very different.

She’ll have people over multiple nights in a row leave dirty dishes and mess everywhere, then leave for the weekend and text, “Don’t feel like you need to clean anything, I’ll do it when I get back.”

But I’m only ever home on weekends, and our first ever “rule” was to keep common areas clean.

She also has people over almost every night, and some nights she’ll have three or more people over without even letting me know first.

And all of this is souring their friendship.

I feel used. We got this apartment because of me. I found it, contacted the landlord, handled the paperwork and got accepted because of my credit.

I also bought all the furniture and handled the utilities and insurance. I gave her chances to take on some of these responsibilities but she wouldn’t contact her insurance or handle things on time, so I had to do it myself.

We have talked about these things and some things have improved!

So this is where I might be the ******* because even with improvements, I have zero intention of renewing the lease with her. She thinks I am.

To make matters worse, this roommate situation wasn’t a spur-of-the-moment thing.

I agreed to move in with her while we were still in high school as her parents were supposed to move out of province. I promised I’d move in to help her.

I even kept this promise even after meeting my wonderful boyfriend (I would never change a promise for a man).

But her parents actually never ended up moving.

When I leave I’ll be taking all my furniture and removing my name from the lease. She can’t afford the full rent (I pay more than half to help her out) or to replace the furniture – I know that sounds mean but it’s the truth.

Regardless though, she believes that going their separate ways would be best for both of them.

As much as I wish I could stay, I know if I do this situation could definitely ruin our friendship so in my opinion I believe it’s better we go our own ways.

I just feel bad that I’ll be leaving her in a tough spot, and my brain can’t stop thinking about all the logistics of this – she doesn’t even have a credit card to her name or savings.

I know it’s not my problem but what should I do? Am I wrong for wanting to leave?

AITA?

It’s clear that these two simply are not compatible as roommates, and that’s okay. Plenty of people aren’t.

It sucks that this is the case, given they’re such good friends, but clearly things aren’t working out and if they want to keep the friendship, it’s important that they’re not building resentment between them, which will undoubtedly happen if they continue living under the same roof.

However if she wants to keep the friendship, it’s important that this woman is honest and speaks up early enough for her friend to plan accordingly, rather than keeping quiet until the last minute.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit said about this.

This person thought that if anyone was ruining the friendship, it was her lazy friend.

While others agreed that she should give her friend plenty of warning.

Meanwhile, this Redditor thought she needed to be clear in her communication.]

It’s absolutely the case that if she doesn’t tell her friend she’s not renewing until the last minute, she would not only be morally in the wrong, but she’d be risking her friendship too.

But so long as she’s honest, respectful, and truthful when she talks to her, after potentially a little rocky time she should have nothing to worry about.

Unless of course the friend really is using her, in which case she might end up losing a fake friend.

But who would want a friend like that anyway?

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.